"But where we start tonight is in the state of Georgia!"

TUESDAY, JANUARY 25, 2022

It was already 9:15: We'll admit that we're somewhat puzzled by the ads for the forthcoming streaming service, CNN+.

At CNN, the thinking seems to be this:

We're already producing 24 hours of programs each day. The bulk of it is lazy work which is almost completely worthless.

Still, having filled the 24 hours of the regular "cable news" day, we'll now be producing additional programs—programs in which our journalistic standards will apparently be even looser!

According to the ads, the big male stars won't even have to wear ties on CNN+! You'll soon be able to watch plain old vanilla CNN or switch over to something that's worse!

Last evening, watching MSNBC, we may have seen the outline of a program called Maddow+. At one point, the star in question told us acolytes this:

"But where we start tonight is in the state of Georgia..."

We were starting tonight in the state of Georgia. the giant cable star said. The problem was, the clock on the cable channel's screen said it was already 9:15! The star had already been yakking, without interruption, for a bit over fifteen minutes!

How had the cable star used that time? In the main, she had wasted the time on pure trivia. 

She had spent the first eleven (11) minutes discussing President Truman's love for ceremonial swords and daggers, not excluding the occasional scabbard.  She had, for example, wasted everyone's time with the monologue shown below. 

We've corrected the many errors in The Slacker Channel's transcript:

MADDOW (1/24/22): Look at all these big old swords and daggers! A little-known fact about the Harry Truman presidency [chuckling] is that he apparently loved this stuff. When he was president, he was given, as gifts, a bunch of these things. It was nothing inappropriate about it. He didn't keep them for himself, he handed them over to the National Archives. They were put on display at his presidential library and museum.

But they were kind of ornate things. This is a 38-inch long presentation sword. The grips of it are gold, it's got four different diamonds inlaid into it. The scabbard, which is like the holder thing that it goes into, is more gold and black leather. It is studded with even more diamonds. It's got 15 diamonds.

Apparently, the gold tassel thing that also came with it, that was not stolen, that was left behind, but the sword and the scabbard were taken. Also, there was this dagger in a scabbard and this dagger in the scabbard fit onto this very pirate-y little belt. This was given to President Harry S Truman by a member of the Saudi royal family.

The belt, which is the thing that you see running horizontally there, it's woven with gold threads, real gold. This scabbard is gold studded with diamonds. The hilt of the dagger itself is also gold. It's got nine more diamond studded into its grip.

Here's a sword that the Shah of Iran gave Truman. This one's silver, a big silver sword and another fancy scabbard thing. And another one that looks like that that's made from different stop from the Saudi crown prince.

And this one is crazy! Look at this one. This is a dagger that seems like it's almost too small to have this entire jewelry stored embedded in it. But look! On this thing, the hilt of it is gold. It's got four fat diamonds in the hilt, and a two and a half carat emerald. Then in the lower grip, it's got a three-carat ruby and another 15 diamonds. 

Then there's the holder thing-y [sic], the scabbard--this is ridiculous. First of all, the scabbard is also gold, naturally. At the tip of it, it's got a three-carat ruby and 12 diamonds. At the base of it, it's an eight and a half-carat emerald, another three-carat ruby, four other rubies, and another 12 diamonds.

[Entertaining beautifully] What, you guys ran out of money and couldn't fit anything else in? You ran out of space, you ran out of money? Why so cheap? 

This is an entire block, like this is an entire block's worth of jewelry stores in one dagger that looks like, you know, a bedazzled garden hose nozzle.

In a world where children die every day, the pointlessness continued along from there. The first fifteen minutes flew or dragged by in roughly this manner, depending on your degree of partisan tribal hypnosis.

MSNBC has been unusually fast with its transcripts today. You can peruse this manifest nonsense yourselves simply by clicking here. In our view, it fits into a framework we've articulated before:

When will NBC News make good on its pledge to take this spent star off the air?

As best we can compute, last evening's Maddow Show featured roughly 45 minutes of actual program, roughly 15 minutes of ads. When Rachel said, "But where we start tonight is in the state of Georgia," roughly one-third of her broadcast minutes had already been pissed away.

From there, we were served our usual porridge. Once the giant star got started, our porridge was ladled to us from these bowls last night:

Last evening's bowls of porridge:
1) Please please please please please please please let Trump get indicted in Georgia! Oh please please please please please!
2) We're going to mess with Sinema good! Sinema's days are numbered!
3) Forgeries forgeries forgeries forgeries forgeries "fake forged documents" forged
4) Two minutes about Ukraine.

With that pleasing porridge in our bellies, we were able to get off to bed. The first 15 minutes had been frittered away with bullshit regarding scabbards and daggers. This is what happens when massively overpaid "cable news" stars signal to the wider world that it's time for them to go.  

In our view, this particular cable news star has made enough money and has gained enough fame. It isn't her fault that she has extremely bad judgment and is preternaturally self-involved, but it's time to get Our Own Rhodes Scholar off this channel's air.

That first fifteen minutes was pure Maddow+. According to many recent ads, CNN's various wonderful stars will soon be following suit!


33 comments:


  1. Whoa, 'streaming service' from the pedo-news-network!

    Sounds super-exciting. To some. Perhaps.

    And Maddow+, wow! We are so thrilled we'll certainly have to take a pill tonight, to fall asleep.

    This, dear Bob, is the bestest day of our life...

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  2. Wait… She said “start” when She had already been on 15 minutes??
    Well Bob has really nailed her this time. How can we begin to rationalize such a critical lapse!!
    Clearly Trump’s deficits are not worth the worry. I have NEVER heard him say start when he had already been talking 15 minutes.

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  3. Somerby continuing his efforts to become as irrelevant as possible.

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  4. "In a world where children die every day, the pointlessness continued along from there."

    Children die every day and Somerby never says anything that would be of any benefit to them whatsoever.

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  5. Maddow talks about Harry S. Truman's swords because it is interesting. It may interest her, but it will interest various of her viewers as well. There is no law that says her show cannot contain interesting history about former presidents.

    If this doesn't interest Somerby, he can go to his computer and donate another $100 to UNICEF to help those dying children worldwide. If he can afford more, he should of course donate more. There is no need for him to seethe and fume at Maddow because she didn't talk immediately about current events, but delved into a little history first.

    Jeez, what is Somerby's problem?

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  6. The porridge recipe sounds about right. One cannot talk about Ukraine when there isn't anything to say yet (that wouldn't be the kind of speculation that Somerby hates). The world is waiting to see how things break in Ukraine. We are also waiting to see what happens with prosecution of Trump and his family and minions.

    The wheels grind slowly but these cable news shows need new info daily. That means there will be some repetition, on any of the channels -- unless you are Fox and can make up new outrages to suit your news cycles. The rest of us need to wait and see what happens in Georgia, New York and in the 1/6 committee's referrals to the DOJ. Is Maddow supposed to manufacture news on these topics, the way Tucker does?

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  7. "The first 15 minutes had been frittered away with bullshit regarding scabbards and daggers."

    Viewers of Forged in Steel, Tod's Workshop, and Forgotten Weapons will be disappointed to hear that no one is interested in old weapons.

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  8. "It isn't her fault that she has extremely bad judgment and is preternaturally self-involved, but it's time to get Our Own Rhodes Scholar off this channel's air."

    Somerby complains because she spent 15 minutes talking about Harry S. Truman and his interest in old weapons. How is that being "preternaturally self-involved"? Last I heard, old Harry S. was not a lesbian woman named Rachel.

    Somerby's fixation on Maddow and his urge to get her off the air, is just embarrassing now. Why obsess over her? This just isn't normal. If you know any of Somerby's friends or relatives, you might give them a head's up about this weird behavior. Liberals don't even obsess over Trump with this much fervor. Something is very wrong in Somerby-ville.

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    Replies
    1. You are gaslighting.

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    2. Go look that word up...

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    3. You don't have a substantive response so you call him crazy and say something is "very wrong" with him. Gaslighting 101.

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    4. That just isn't what gaslighting is. Go look it up somewhere.

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    5. Best case it's a logical fallacy. Ad hominem.

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  9. Who is to say that old weapons with tassels are not more important than young children, dying or not?

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  10. With all the cats and dogs dying all over the world, how can Somerby be so preoccupied with children?

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    Replies

    1. Yeah. Even though dear Bob is not your typical brain-dead liberal, unfortunately he still is a liberal.

      And as a liberal he is, alas, powerless against the craving for virtue signaling...

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  11. Gee, I guess Maddow just likes talking about Harry Truman’s weapons, with no connection or relevance to anything.

    But uh oh!

    Here is how she connects it to the fake electors story

    “And here if you want even more detail, here is all whole website version of the wanted poster. Not just pictures but detailed descriptions of the swords, and the daggers, and all the jewels, and the descriptions of them with information about how to report information if you come across any of these things. And this website is as on the website of the National Archives because it turns out the national archives, your national honors, our national archives as Americans, they`ve got a detective unit.”

    The National Archives has a detective unit, and, says Maddow:

    “Politico.com is just reported that those cops are the cops on the case”

    The case meaning the case of the fake electors.

    Somerby must believe nobody will actually read the transcripts.

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  12. I doubt that Trump will be indicted in Georgia or anywhere else. However, if he's indicted and acquitted, that will help him win the nomination IMO.

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    Replies
    1. Trump doesn't have to "win" the nomination. It is his for the asking. If there is a trial, he may lose voters because anyone reasonable will have a chance to see what a bully and crook he is.

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    2. Yes, it will probably be the acquittal, and not the daily bigotry he provides the Republican base to get out the vote.
      LOL.

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    3. Republican voters will find a way bigger piece of shit than a RINO, like Trump, to nominate in 2024.

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  13. It’s a very silly post. I don’t mind Maddow’s occasional, if sometimes irrelevant, look back into time. But it’s interesting that She won’t, maybe can’t, take a look at the Clinton years, when a highly successful President’s legacy has been obscured by now laughable obsessions over his sexual misbehavior. How Monica Lewinsky was actually trying to extort a high paying job out of the White House, how Ken Starr wasted ten of millions on fake scandals to keep it all going and tear the Country apart for now clearly psycho Newt Gingrich. Wasn’t Vince Foster the first Qanon case? And how it’s forbidden to mention any of this due in large part to the left’s “me too” commitments. Bob knows all this, it’s may be why he hates Maddow. But will his new sugar daddy let him write about it?

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    Replies
    1. You're completely retarded.

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    2. Ha. I’ll have to take some time taking apart your deep rebuttal. Enjoy your oathkeepers meeting tonight.

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    3. 2024 is going to be very rough for Democrats.

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    4. The media has to report every utterance by Newt Gingrich. They don't want to miss it if he makes a good faith argument for the first time ever (even if it is by accident).

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  14. Why does Maddow insist on talking about irrelevant things like the destruction of our democracy?

    When will she discuss the DYING CHILDREN???

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    Replies
    1. Has Bob expressed in the subsequent years anything to suggest he is truly applauded by Trump’s rape of the Capital? I didn’t catch it if he did. And you know, it’s not because he doesn’t feel it or is a coward. He’s a zealot dedicated to his cult, perhaps a cult of one.

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    2. No I think he did say he was applauded by it.

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