Governor Botox, come on down!

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 21, 2024

The soul of a certain news channel: At the risk of beating a dead horse, we thought you might want to see the type of primetime news analysis offered on the Fox News Channel this past Monday night.

We're speaking about the Gutfeld! show which aired that night at 10 p.m., 7 p.m. out on the coast. 

Producers had assembled the usual panel of expert analysts. This being Presidents Day, Greg Gutfeld opened the show by defining the evening's first topic in the manner shown:

GUTFELD (2/19/24): Tonight, we honor all those who have held the nation's highest office. Well, unless you don't like them. Then you destroy them.

Judge Arthur Engeron just handed down a $350 million first-of-its-kind settlement against Donald Trump, after finding that Trump inflated the value of his real estate when applying for loans. 

The judge released his opinion six days before the trial began, which makes it a show trial except instead of Judge Judy, we get someone that no one wants to have sex with.

[PHOTO OF JUDGE ENGORON APPEARS]

No one wants to have sex with the judge! At 10:01, the program was off to its standard high-minded start. 

Moments later, Gutfeld was describing the judge as "this proud legal eagle whose drooling grin has the look of the forcibly medicated." Water was finding its level at this point in time. 

For various reasons, this particular legal case offers plenty of opportunity for serious debate and discussion among people who may actually know what they're talking about. Panelists of that type are rarely booked to appear on the primetime Gutfeld! show.

In this case, the program's host quoted a financial observer who said this verdict will drive big investors out of New York. As the clock was reading 10:05, this inspired the program's host to break out the evening's first nickname:

GUTFELD: But not to fear, Governor Botox is here! 

Kathy Hochul assures the business community that everything is fine. Law-abiding and rule-following New Yorkers who are businesspeople have nothing to worry about.

That's what Governor Botox had said! This seems to be who and what—and apparently all—this 59-year-old Fox News star is really capable of.

The Fox News star is 59! This seems to be about as far as he has managed to get. 

In fairness, even Gutfeld may have been mildly taken aback by what occurred when he threw to comedian Jimmy Failla during this first discussion. 

Failla now hosts his own primetime Fox News show on Saturday and Sunday nights. He started his analysis of the Engoron verdict with these observations:

FAILLA: There's a lot of people out there, OK. who hate Trump so they don't have to look inward at the things they hate about themselves. 

Like if you grew up here in New York, you knew Trump was a part of New York. He had a show on NBC for fifteen years. He wasn't a fringe loony in a shed.  He was Trump.

So I think two pieces of advice. One, he can get out of this mess in like ten seconds if he just starts selling pictures of Melania's feet on OnlyFans. OK?

I'm good for like five grand right now, OK? Melania, if you're watching, and I know you are.

That's where his analysis started. (For the record, OnlyFans is said to be "an internet content subscription service...used primarily by sex workers who produce pornography.")

That's where the primetime analysis started. Just a guess, based on long experience:

To our ear, the audience didn't seem to understand the reference to OnlyFans. Now Failla turned to this second observation, generating a strong reaction:

FAILLA (continuing directly): The only person I'll give any credence to is Kathy Hochul, if only because— 

I don't agree with her politically. But if you're ever in a pinch, and you need to lose a boner immediately—

[BURST OF AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]

—she's undefeated. She is undefeated!

That's what you do if you're in a pinch! After pausing for audience laughter, Failla continued his thought:

FAILLA (continuing directly): Like you're going to an important meeting, like parent teacher conferences, and you got a woody, you bust out the Hochul! Smooth sailing!

[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE]

GUTFELD: I didn't see that, uh, coming, so to speak.

FAILLA: Think about it. That is her claim to fame. She's the one chick Cuomo didn't try to bang!

So it went as this garbage-can "cable news" aggregation struggled to find its level.

Sad! The mental world of this program's host is populated by people like President Poopy Pants and Governor Botox. On this occasion, along came the new star Failla to take his sour and angry host down several more levels of the world.

This is who and what these panelists frequently seem to be. This goes on, night after night, and seldom is heard a discouraging word about this squalid primetime conduct from within our struggling nation's finer and higher news orgs.

At any rate, a bit of credit to the 59-year-old Gutfeld himself. Though he seemed to be caught by surprise, he managed to include an instant double entendre in the rejoinder we've posted above.

For the record, there's nothing especially new about any this. Within the realm of cable news, we'd date it to Chris Matthews' peculiar frisking of liberal women on the Hardball shows of the late 1990s.

There's nothing new about the pitiful gender politics, or about the press corps' attendant silence. The stupidity is simply getting deeper, and the silence is getting more vast.

To watch Failla's disquisition, you should start by clicking here.


44 comments:

  1. It's almost as if years of gatekeeping who can get media degrees and survive in successful neighborhoods created a Darwinian selection process that selects the most mediocre white upper class Catholics to lead the country and this is what they think is funny. Har har, boners and poop! Anything to keep the dark memories of the priest and nuns abusing people out of my head! Lalalala

    ReplyDelete
  2. The truth is Matthews may be worse, because he has displayed that all those years he was whoring for W and Rudy he had the ability to knock it off, Gutfeld venal stupidity might be utterly authentic. When the word came from upstairs to switch gears Chris was willing to do it but he didn’t have to work much harder, so he didn’t. All his pals on the right felt betrayed.
    Remember Bob only became aware of the level Fox had sunk to because he didn’t like hearing about the “legal trivia” of what Trump had done.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Garbage-can 'cable news' aggregation" and "squalid primetime conduct." See how cleverly that Somerby is grooming us to accept as true the claims made at this channel?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gutfeld is low hanging fruit. He’s a (purported) comic, so he’s doing (insult) comedy. Maybe Somerby should take on the more “serious” Fox presenters, assuming such exist. Or is that too much work?

      Delete
    2. Garbage-can? Squalid? That’s just ad hominem insults.

      Delete
    3. David and Cecelia find Gutfeld! amusing.

      Delete
    4. David and Cecelia always kill my boner.

      Delete
    5. "That’s just ad hominem insults."

      Yes! You get it! Somerby is insulting the Fox news channel, not promoting it.

      Delete
    6. If Somerby were really trying to address Fox seriously, he would deal with the lies and not the jokes.

      Delete
  4. Ed Clark, the guy responsible for the notorious 737 Max, is out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't know anything about his private life. He's out of Boeing.

      Delete
  5. Russia was a hoax! Russia was a hoax!

    Oh wait…nevermind.

    ReplyDelete
  6. "GUTFELD (2/19/24): Tonight, we honor all those who have held the nation's highest office. Well, unless you don't like them. Then you destroy them.

    Judge Arthur Engeron just handed down a $350 million first-of-its-kind settlement against Donald Trump, after finding that Trump inflated the value of his real estate when applying for loans.

    The judge released his opinion six days before the trial began, which makes it a show trial except instead of Judge Judy, we get someone that no one wants to have sex with."

    Somerby seems mostly concerned about the low-grade sex jokes and not the disinformation communicated in Gutfeld's intro:

    1. Trump is not being destroyed because those who organized President's Day dislike him. He is being destroyed by the law catching up to his illegal actions.

    2. "Judge Arthur Engeron just handed down a $350 million first-of-its-kind settlement against Donald Trump". First, this is not "first of its kind unless you consider that the judgment is against an ex-president. This crime is charged frequently. Second, the Judge did not hand down a "settlement" but a "judgment" based on the trial. A settlement is negotiated and proposed by the DA, then ratified by the judge. That isn't what happened in this case. Third, the judgment wasn't only against Trump but also his children and Trump Organization staff, such as Weisselberg. The wrongdoing was not only inflating values but many other forms of deceit, such as estimating his Trump Tower penthouse at three times its square footage. As the judge stated, the defendants showed no contrition or remorse for their actions, which were deliberate and proven beyond doubt.

    3. The judge ruled that Trump was guilty 6 days before the penalty phase of the trial, which was solely to determine what the consequences of his actions should be. The guilty verdict was not bias but based on the evidence presented by the DA. The judge made that ruling because Trump's attorneys and the DA both requested a "bench trial" and not a jury trial. In a bench trial, the judge makes the decision about guilt or innocence. Trump's accusation that it was a show trial is incorrect and an expression of his own distress, not a fact.

    Why is it important for Somerby to address this disinformation when repeating it? Because Republican believe Trump when he says this stuff. There are also people who may read this page who are low-information voters or just not following the in's and out's of Trump's legal problems. Somerby himself said he was tired of following that stuff. But letting inaccuracies stand works against the Democrats because this Gutfeld tripe is what makes their crude jokes appear deserved, instead of an abuse of public servants who did their job to convict Trump of crimes that went on for decades. The amount of the fine (plus interest) is estimated based on how much experts testified that he stole via his illegal acts. This is payback for Trump, not persecution.

    But if you listen to Somerby, the main problem with Fox is bad jokes, not the lies Gutfeld set up his audience with. This is why I consider these essays by Somerby to be in bad faith, a ruse to convince his readers that he is liberal and not a Republican asshole who helps spread misinformation in support of a major criminal.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies


    1. I notice a double standard here.

      When Bob criticizes liberals he's being a traitor. When you criticize liberals you're defending the ideology. When Bob mocks Trump's arguments he's being silly. When you do it you're being serious.

      You think with your ego and are in a middle class American liberal cult but you don't see it.

      Delete
    2. You claim to notice a double standard but then fail to substantiate your claim, all you have on offer is some descriptive nonsense devoid of context.

      You sum it up with a non sequitur that might elicit some chuckles at your expense, but the more appropriate response is pity.

      Delete
    3. pied Piper just ripped you a new one too buddy

      Delete
    4. This is what right wingers are always like. @7:13 thinks this is about owning libs when it is about defending truth and throwing out the lies. Who cares what Pied Piper thinks, or you either?

      Delete
    5. @7:41
      Your cult mindset is objectively stupid and useless

      Delete
    6. You're picking on a retired school teacher who is tired of center right corporate libs and far right toxicity and calling him a secret conservative spy

      Get a fucking life and touch grass

      Delete
    7. Look you offered useful analysis about Trump but you gave absolutely no evidence that Bob is trying to suppress the news of Trump's criminality, youre a white middle class solipsist

      Delete
    8. Biden is losing to trump because y'all are in a cult like a Star Trek convention

      Delete
    9. There's a looming threat of fascist takeover and you're using a cracker Jack decoder ring to figure out who doesn't belong to your cult

      Delete
  7. Somerby has mentioned Gutfeld’s “poopy pants” reference to Biden in 8 different posts so far. Somerby himself keeps telling us how old Biden is. Seems like double teaming.

    ReplyDelete
  8. This bizarre theory that Somerby castigates Fox so that we will believe Fox's lies is bonkers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It takes some kind of courage to admit you’re as gullible as you are. Bravo!

      Delete
    2. That's right. I should have realized:
      1. Somerby is a conservative.
      2. Somerby lies and says he's a liberal.
      3. The reason Somerby says he's a liberal is to persuade us that he's one of us.
      4. The reason Somerby lies and says he's one of us is so we will be more likely to listen to what he says.
      5. The reason Somerby castigates Fox is to confirm his representation that he's a liberal so we will listen to what he says.
      6. After Somerby calls Fox reports squalid garbage, we'll start to believe that Fox's squalid garbage is true.

      Let's skip past the fact that there's no evidence whatsoever that supports 1-5. Here's what I don't get: How is Somerby calling Fox reports squalid garbage supposed to persuade us to believe those reports?

      Delete
    3. Americans feel powerless and need a scapegoat and Bob offers himself up every day for free to these goobers to vent and they gladly take the opportunity.

      Bob further has a personal style of a lecturer and scold and middle class people don't like being scolded so they tighten up and attack blindly with gut assumptions.

      In some journals it's called "self essentialization" but really it's a stereotype of the self response and that response is low intelligence because it has to simplify the world to make it easier to feel power over and project all insecurities into the adversary.

      Delete
    4. I get you are triggered, but there’s been plenty of evidence provided for 1-5, daily.

      Somerby is a bitter old man, who has lost a once promising career as an influential blogger, so he reinvented himself as The Public Enemy pushing grapefruit into the face of the blue tribe, not just putting his thumb on the scale (to tip it towards his right wing world view), but to put a thumb in the eye and thumb his nose at the blue tribe.

      Part of why he is so bitter towards the contemporary iteration of the blue tribe is because we have moved on from his preferred politics of Third Way neoliberalism.

      Delete
    5. 7:16

      I don't think you know what anything you wrote means

      Delete
    6. Pied Piper, you left out the part where Somerby repeats the right wing talking point of the day, every day. And the part where he doesn't debunk right wing lies or defend any Democratic candidate. And the part where Somerby himself attacks Democratic presidential nominees and repeatedly claims that Trump is going to win because we liberals are crap. And you have left out all the rants that Somerby went on to take the opposite side of Democratic issues, including but not limited to: (1) calling Ketanji Brown Jackson underqualified for the Supreme Court, (2) defending Roy Moore, (3) accusing Chanel Miller of causing her own rape by getting drunk at a party, (4) complaining that there were no Republicans on the 1/6 Committee after all but two Republicans refused to participate, (5) refusing to watch the 1/6 Hearings, (6) defending Trump by calling him crazy and to be pitied, a believer of his own lies, and thus not prosecutable, (7) complaining that an Asian woman whose grandmother was attacked in NYC was exaggerating the extent of racism against Asians during covid, (8) saying that black students needed to invent microaggressions because they weren't experiencing actual racism in their own lives, (9) supporting banning of books by defending parents rights, even though that was not the issue.

      You can believe your fantasy version of Somerby, but that isn't who this guy is.

      Delete
    7. 7:16 - I like that. Somerby has one thumb on the scale, a second thumb in the eye, and a third thumb on his nose.

      But you still haven't told me how Somerby calling Fox reports "garbage" is supposed to persuade us that the garbage is true.

      Delete
    8. 7:39 - I think you're wrong on virtually every assertion you make, but let's stay on the topic at hand. How does Somerby saying that Fox reports are garbage tend to make us believe that those reports are actually true?

      Delete
    9. Somerby’s use of “squalid” seems to refer to Gutfeld’s comedy, not “Fox reports”

      Delete
  9. Trump farted his way to the Sneaker Con where he and his pooped filled diaper were booed off the stage, leaving only Trump Stench in his wake.

    The poor guy, after losing in 2020, largely because Americans don’t want a Putin puppet for president, he’s now losing his mind.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I didn't know they let people your age vote these days

      Delete
  10. Nikki Haley supports the decision by the Alabama Supreme Court which said that embryos created by in vitro fertilization are children. She said, "Embryos are babies."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right wingers have no ideology, their anti abortion stance was borne from a strategy to maintain racial segregation; it’s not a genuine stance.

      Haley, is a run of the mill right winger, but has appropriately earned kudos for attacking Trump instead of bowing down and kissing his feet, as most Republicans do.

      Delete
  11. Calchas told Agamemnon to sacrifice Iphigenia.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iphigenia_in_Aulis

    ReplyDelete
  12. I still find it bizarre that the story that Fox has been obsessed with, the Hunter Biden bs, which they have covered thousands of times, has been almost completely ignored by Somerby. Even the recent post was a one-off.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And, as another blog pointed out, the Smirnoff story, a story of enormous ramifications, appeared on page A16 of the New York Times. But Somerby prefers to gambol and play with Gutfeld and his poopypants jokes.

      Delete
  13. Angela Chao has died.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Republicans aren't going to let the fact that their star witness is a liar, deter them from trying to impeach Joe Biden, because Republicans never believed a word of Smirnov's testimony to begin with. That was just something the media made up, and reported.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The above post should have ended, "That was just something the media made up, and reported, daily."

      I apologize for the error.

      Delete