FRIDAY, DECEMBER 22, 2023
Red tribe, blue comedy style: What did we see on red tribe "cable news" last night?
It's depressing to tell you about it!
At 10 p.m., we saw Greg Gutfeld go to work. First, though, a brief aside:
We almost share the old school system tie with the "cable news" star. Gutfeld went to Serra High, roughly one mile down the Alameda from our own Aragon High.
Tom Brady graduated from Serra; Barry Bonds did too. That said, the school produces a certain number of Gutfeld types, or at least it used to.
Whatever! As you can see by clicking this link, he started the program like this:
GUTFELD (12/21/23): Happy Thursday! So, are the young ones about to give the boot to that drooling old coot?
Needless to say, the "drooling old coot" of this tableau was none other than Joe Biden.
Gutfeld's opening monologue focused on a new Fox poll which showed Trump with a seven-point lead over Biden among voters under 30. About one minute into his rumination, Gutfeld described the two hopefuls:
"So we got two possible candidates," he thoughtfully said. "One of them is skin glued to a skeleton, and the other is Trump."
Why have younger voters turned against President Biden? Gutfeld quickly noted that Biden "hasn't kept his promise to saddle taxpayers with the bill for their college loans."
As you can see by clicking this link, here's what he then said:
GUTFELD: After all, he said he'd pay their debts for them using our money. He had no authority to make that promise, but he figured we wouldn't notice.
But we did, you asshole!
Yes, that's what he actually said, and producers didn't bleep it. At this point, we were two minutes into the cable star's thoughtful opening monologue.
As the monologue proceeded, Gutfeld announced that climate change isn't real, then described Biden as a "demented old circus monkey." He said that Andrea Mitchell is so old that she might be Amelia Earhart.
By rule, a reference to Jeffrey Dahmer had also been thrown in.
He now said that, thanks to transgender policy, we were moving toward a time when the only babysitter you could find would be "a fat hairy dude named Francine." Then, he decided to describe the two candidates again:
GUTFELD: The fact is, if this election was a taste test between Trump and Biden, well, one would be a refreshing, ice-cold Coke and the other a warm glass of rancid piss.
[LAUGHTER]
"You know, as opposed to the fresh piss," he sagely added, bringing his world-class wit into play.
Nearing the merciful end of his speech, he referred to Biden as someone who wanted to ejaculate into a young woman's hair—and no, we aren't making that up. This sort of thing has become a standard part of our rapidly failing nation's version of "cable news."
By now, we were roughly ten minutes into the Gutfeld! program. The host now introduced his standard lineup of guests—one pro wrestler, two low-grade comedians, and someone dragged in from Outnumbered.
Soon, they were discussing the favorite news topic of Gutfeld and Jesse Watters:
Whose names will be on the list of people who once took a flight on Jeffrey Epstein's jet? Last night, this is the way our most-watched "cable news" channel burned up the 10 o'clock hour.
Even back in our day, Serra High occasionally produced a rancid-adjacent soul like this. We think of [NAME WITHHELD], who got expelled for including a profane remark inside a ten-page term paper, mistakenly thinking that no one at Serra actually read such works.
In that instance, somebody did!
What no one in the mainstream press corps does is comment on what takes place on the Fox News Channel. This kind of dumbbell garbage-can blather is aired every night at 8 and 10 p.m. by current gutter stars Watters and Gutfeld.
In closing, we'll offer this:
We're sure that Gutfeld is secretly better than this. (We once saw our friend Will Durst, San Francisco's own, appearing on one of Greg's earlier programs.)
According to Santa, Gutfeld is secretly less stupid and rancid than this. That said, it's going to be a blue, blue Christmas as his rancid, red tribe comedy stylings continue to fill the air.
I wonder how much Putin is paying Somerby to call Fox shows "dumbbell garbage-can blather"?
ReplyDeleteHow much is Gutfield being paid, given that he is much better than his show, according to Somerby?
DeleteWas it really necessary for Somerby to repeat each of the anti-Biden jokes in order to show us that Gurfield is anti-Biden?
How might Putin, in his campaign to reelect Trump, benefit from showing those anti-Biden jokes to a group of liberals here, instead of just presenting them to the usual Fox true-believers?
Note that Somerby is outrage by something Gutfield said, but it is the use of profanity, not his unfair and demeaning attacks on our sitting president:
GUTFIELD: "But we did [notice the attempted student debt forgiveness], you asshole!
SOMERBY: "Yes, that's what he actually said, and producers didn't bleep it."
There are worse forms of profanity than Carlin's seven words not allowed on TV.
Somerby wants to blame Christmas, titling his piece today: "Have yourself a grimy little Christmas!" But does this have anything to do with Christmas at all, and a great deal to do with the mean-spirited cruelty that passes for humor on the right?
Somerby is trying to portray himself as liberal but he doesn't have the reflexes to complain about the things that actually bother those in our blue tribe. Today he sounds like a jealous stand-up competitor, not someone truly outraged by the disrespect shown to a man who got us through covid, fixed the recession and is now trying to negotiate peace on Earth. Somerby's reactions are not those of a good, decent person and it doesn't matter at all that Gutfield's are not either -- at least Gutfield knows who he is, where the money is coming from, and who it benefits.
It’s such dumbbell garbage can blather that I watch it every night.
DeleteGood jokes…bad jokes… in between jokes…and demeaning politicians… used to be a proud American tradition.
DeleteI’m starting to think ALL the crybabies here deserve each other.
The psycho witch finally showed up. It is Bob Somerby, the CRYBABY, who published this attack on Gutfeld’s rancid act, but let’s pretend it’s the commenters.
DeleteCan you not read things written in all caps?
DeleteAre you saying Bob is a crybaby? Because that wasn’t clear from your comment. Bob is usually excluded from your attacks.
DeleteYou’re all crying about dumb and puerile jokes about the Big Guy.
DeleteNo one is crying about the jokes.
DeleteCrying about dumb jokes and likely wishing to get the show cancelled.
DeleteThat’s how you roll.
7:30 - If anyone can defend themselves on this site it’s Cecelia, so I won’t say much, but I will say that I find your sexist and misogynistic attacks to be deplorable and disgusting.
DeleteI’m was surprised to see her substituting “witch” for “bitch”.
DeleteI think she and her coven are more familiar with the term and it just trips off her tongue.
Cecelia seems to be misgendering @7:30. Calling women witches is sexist too. Dogface, you are defending the wrong person.
DeleteAnonymouse 8:45pm, how would you (or anyone else) know that I’m misgendering Anonymouse 7:30pm?
DeleteAlso, DG is not really defending me.
No one here is crying about gutfeld, except maybe Somerby, who brought him up in the first place. I spend zero amount of time worrying or even holding a thought about gutfeld, unlike your boy Bob.
DeleteAnonymouse 9:01pm, there’s no doubt that I’m always numero uno on your concern list. but I’m sure ole Greg Gutfeld rates a solid second place today for dissing St. Joseph.
DeleteI don’t care. Ask Bob.
DeleteI can tell.
DeleteYou seem to think @7:30 is female since you called them “her” and referred to “she” and “her coven” which is a gendered female term. But you don’t know what gender @7:30 is. Like most men, you think it is insulting to someone to refer to them as female if they are not. This is one of the many reasons I dislike you.
DeleteAnonymouse 9:16pm, that makes no sense since you could as easily (and as illogically) say that I was being sexist by defaulting to male pronouns when speaking of you.
DeleteWhen you don’t know, just ask. This is why some people tell others how they prefer to be addressed (their pronouns), as a matter of courtesy. But it is sexist to assume someone is male and to call someone female as an insult. Don’t pretend coven wasn’t intended that way.
DeleteThe original commenter was being hostile by referring to a psycho bitch, and wasn’t talking about you. The subsequent comments about you (sort of a joke) also suggest that you are not liked here. Your aggressive, nasty entrance shows why.
The prounoun by which we address people is “you”. We use “he”, “she”, and “they” to refer to them.
DeleteAnonymouse 9:43pm, how do I “just ask” an anonymouse, in a slew of anonymices, their gender, and have that mean anything at all two seconds later?
DeleteIt wouldn’t from one post to the next.
No, this your usual bellyaching about someone not doing right by you in some way. It’s all contrived and petulant and meant to distract from the fact that you’re a not very bright apparatchik.
Girl, get your panties out of your crack before you choke on them.
How do you choke on panties in your crack? I am Korbi.
DeleteCecelia identifies a poster by the time of the post, and then asks how it could be done, then thinks if you get your panties stuck in your bottem you can chock on them. Our girl seems to be hitting the egg nog early….
DeleteAnonymouse 12:51am, your post is a sterling illustration of how your panties are so far up your crack that you’re choking on them.
DeleteYour favorite insult. Do men wear panties? Do you really care if your insults are gendered or not? Obviously not. Women don't like being used as insults against men, except you. Another reason you are unlikely to be female as you claim. How have you conveyed your gender to others here? This isn't rocket science.
Delete"Good jokes..."
DeleteWhat the fuck are you talking about, 7:25?
Anonymouse 6:42am, I call you a woman because you are one. I have that insight born of instinct because I are one too…
DeleteThat’s the only authority I’ll ever relegate to gender, which is utterly different from the way you try to use it.
Whatever it takes to cheer along the Republican Party taking your "sisters" reproductive rights away, I say.
DeleteBe careful when you buy panties. They can be a choking hazard. Look at the label. Are they certified crack-resistant?
Delete@10:23 AM
DeleteYou're free to reproduce, Corby. If you manage to find a sperm donor.
ReplyDeleteSounds funny, maybe I should watch it sometime.
By the way, the pro wrestler and the comedians thingy, is it anything like Jerry Lawler and Andy Kaufman? If it is, I'm definitely in.
There was a point where Andy Kaufman stopped being funny. But I don't think Gutfield or Somerby are doing performance art.
DeleteWhat happened to Andy Kaufman? Did his material get boring because it was more of the same? Or did it actually get worse? I am Corby.
DeleteIt got weirder until it was strange instead of funny.
DeleteKaufman died in 1984 at age 35.
DeleteKaufman did bizarre things that were characterized as staged, not real, performance to assault people’s expectations. It was hard to tell what was serious, intentional, real. As a consequence, many people did not believe he had actually died, even after his funeral. His brother claimed he was alive and only died of covid in his 70s. Is it funny to confuse, upset, and deceive people? You tell me.
DeleteThe failed real estate developer from Queens stole his act.
DeleteFox News killed David’s soul.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate todays post since I never watch Gutfield. TBH I’m kind of shocked Fox allows this type of drivel- just wow.
ReplyDeleteYes, it’s amazing that a channel that got slapped with three quarters of a billion dollar fine for lying about the 2020 election would stoop so low. 🙄
DeleteIt was tough to watch Gutfeld. But I did it, as I do every night. I am not a crank.
ReplyDeleteDiC - 3Q GDP - 4.9%. It can’t possibly remain this hot and will have to moderate, I’m sure.
ReplyDeleteI am happy that the economy is doing so well. However, I'm worried. I feel that the huge deficits started by Trump and continued by Biden must lead to disaster. There's a joke about the Optimist Who Fell from a Tall Building Said While Passing Each Story “All’s Well So Far."
Deletehttps://quoteinvestigator.com/2019/03/09/fall/
There are lots of things to worry about. Did you anticipate the real estate driven recession in 2008-2009?
DeleteThis from no more mr nice blog (Tom Hilton filling in for Steve) discusses an article by Jonathan Last that perfectly describes Somerby’s bullshit:
ReplyDeletehttps://nomoremister.blogspot.com/2023/12/more-excellent-news-for-john-mccain.html?m=1
I’ll answer Dogface here. Since roughly the middle of W’s term, Bob’s visits to Fox News have been few and far between. Fox never really stopped being the number one cable news network, but he always had more time for MSNBC, especially after they repositioned himself as the left network ( not that this corporate shift could not be assailed as cynical)
ReplyDeleteSo it’s nice that in recent weeks Bob has, more or less, rediscovered the network ( he had nothing to say about its 88 million dollar embarrassment) . I would say, watch his new audience in the comment section scatter, if he keeps it up that is.
“We're sure that Gutfeld is secretly better than this.”
ReplyDeleteNope. Wrong. His garbage act is who he is, but please continue pretending that he has a better side. He’s not worth the digital bits that illuminate this blog.
Like Somerby did with Tucker Carlson, whose mother abandoned him at a tender age, surely he can discover the time when gutfeld’s mother sent him to bed without supper or washed his mouth out with soap, to explain behavior that Somerby otherwise finds inexplicable.
ReplyDeleteThe Major League Baseball player Ryan Minor has died of colon cancer, forty-nine years old.
ReplyDeleteKathy Hochul stinks.
ReplyDeletehttps://jabberwocking.com/new-york-governor-foolishly-allows-noncompetes-to-continue/
I’m not really Corby, but I play Corby in Howler comments.
ReplyDelete