STRANGERS AND FRIENDS: This just in from the world's strangest man!

MONDAY, AUGUST 4, 2025

"There needs to be scalps," he said: Unless you live in "a distant land from me" (Thoreau), the fellow's a tough act to swallow.

We've long advised against our own Blue America's impulse to drop our tribe's various bombs—racist, sexist, homophobe, transphobe, xenophobe and the like.

In truth, our own tribe barely has a sexual politics at all. as we toss our bombs around, we show very few signs of knowing that about ourselves.)

We've long advised against the promiscuous use of those bombs. But the "cable news" star to whom we refer operates in a realm which—if words have any meaning at all—will inevitably seem to be baldly misogynistic. 

You can add his bizarre obsession with body waste and his love of sexual insult. Unless you live in "a distant land," these peculiar traits make him a difficult figure to love.

Throw in the D-list stooges who support him every night and the audiences who cheer and applaud his behavior! When you do, you've formed a picture of a former nation whose established culture, for better or worse, is rapidly coming apart.

We regard the fellow as "Unrecognizable"—as a type of person we've never encountered in real life. That said, millions of people enjoy the porridge he serves—and then, we come to the greatest offenders of all:

We come to the major stars of Blue America who refuse to even say his name, let alone report or discuss what he does on the air every day, first at 5 p.m. (The Five) and then on his own show at 10.

We regard the angry little man as a difficult fellow to like. That said, we've long advised you to "pity the child"—and our culture suggests that we should regard such strangers as friends. 

Lincoln put it like this:

We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.

He said that in his first inaugural address. A war then took place among friends.

When we ended Saturday's report, the strange little guy had engaged in his typical ugly and stupid behavior at the start of his prime time "cable news" show on Thursday, July 24. 

His studio audience would cheer what he went on to say after that. In Blue America, our major tribunes would all agree that they must avert their gaze.

As we noted, the angry man would make his transition at 10:02 Eastern that night. Below, you see the last of the evening's "fun, smart" jokes—and you also the start of his nightly "issue monologue:"

GUTFELD (7/24/25): Finally, the man who wrote "YMCA" claims the songs is not a gay anthem, as so many people believe.

Right! And "Stairway to Heaven" isn't about anal!

AUDIENCE: [Unsettled murmurs]

GUTFELD (dismissively): Whatever.

[Jokes end / Monologue starts]

So once again, the media pretends that their corrupt, shameful behavior never happened. Which means it's time for:

ANNOUNCER: Yi-i-i-ikes! Well, nothing to see here!

GUTFELD: They did it with the Covid lab leak, the "fine people" hoax, the Haitian whipping hoax, and of course Joe Biden's brain, where they claimed it was fine when it was missing more screws than a Mexican roller coaster.

Now it's the Russian collusion hoax. 

You can watch the whole monologue simply by starting here.

As you can see, the angry fellow had ended his several minutes of "fun, smart" jokes with a wonderful quip about anal. With that, it was on to his monologue about what he called "the Russian collusion hoax." 

The monologue was built around the failure of "the media" to fall in line behind Tulsi Gabbard's ongoing claim that President Obama had engaged in treason near the end of his second term. Behind the furious, sex-obsessed man, his topic was announced on the screen:

RUSSIAN COLLUSION HOAX

In fact, the behavior by Obama which Gabbard was citing didn't involve any claim of collusion. This little man, though perpetually angry, isn't a stickler for detail.

In that passage, you've already seen the way this fellow started his "issue monologue." We'll now walk you through it step by step.

As we showed you on Saturday, the monologue continued in this pathetically childish way as his studio audience sheered:

GUTFELD: Now it's the Russian collusion hoax. 

So as we unravel the scheme to derail a Trump presidency, the media now wants all of us to move on, after gaslighting us like Jerry Nadler with a Bic lighter near his butt hole.

And so, like the dead bird on Maxine Waters' head, we're supposed to ignore it!

Even as he pretended to discuss an actual topic, his ad hominem insults continued. On this astonishing "cable news" show," Rep. Nadler is routinely assailed for how humongous and smelly his body waste is—and no, we aren't making that up—and Rep. Waters is often said to have a dead animal of some kind on her head.

His studio audiences cheer and applaud. "Man [sic] is the rational animal," Aristotle is widely said to have said.

Joe and Mika won't discuss this behavior. Neither will Rachel or Lawrence.

David Brooks won't discuss this behavior. That said, this behavior takes place, each weekday night, before a very large viewership all across our rapidly failing nation.

At this point, the furious fellow had made his transition from jokes about anal to what posed as a real discussion of a major news topic:

Director Gabbard was out there making her claims, and "the media" wasn't treating her claims as gospel. That had this strange person quite angry. Today, we'll show you the night assault he staged on the nation as his monologue continued.

(For the record, it's Fox News CEO Suzanne Scott who pries the lid off the can each night and lets this garbage slither out. We think it's important to say the names of the people who are most deeply at fault in this mess.)

The transition to the monologue had occurred. Where did this manifest nutcase go after that? 

Let's break his five-minute monologue up into its several parts. We'll leave mist of the personal insults in. Where would this friend be without them?

Part One: "They swallowed it like a dick"

The stranger and friend was angry now. Part One of his exposition went like this:

GUTFELD: Now it's the Russian collusion hoax. 

So as we unravel the scheme to derail a Trump presidency, the media now wants all of us to move on, after gaslighting us like Jerry Nadler with a Bic lighter near his butt hole.

And so, like the dead bird on Maxine Waters' head, we're supposed to ignore it!

[Videotape of CNN's Jeff Zeleny starting to challenge Gabbard]

GUTFELD: Oh, hmmmmppphh!

I get why they want everyone to forget the past ten years. I would want it as well if  I were them.

Their lies created more trauma than those leaked photos from Kathy Griffin's sex tape. 

[UNFLATTERING PHOTO OF KATHY GRIFFIN]

The Democrats, directed by Obama, concocted the claim that Trump conspired with Russia to win in 2016. Then they fed a made-to-order report of Russian meddling to the press, who swallowed it like a dick. 

No! Really, you have to be a dick to swallow stuff like that.

And it wasn't just some small story. It was a relentless narrative that actually ruined lives. What they did to all of us with this hoax is unforgivable and it demands justice.

The press corps "swallowed it like a dick," the articulate fellow now said. For the record:

If we're talking about the claim that Russia meddled in the 2016 election, everyone else has also "swallowed that claim," including the Republican-led Senate Intelligence Committee in its voluminous five-volume report on the 2016 election.

Everyone agrees that the Russians did "meddle in that election!" Everyone understands that fact except this unrecognizable fellow.

On the other hand, if we're talking about the claim that Candidate Trump, or the Trump campaign, colluded with the Russians, no such claim was made in the treasonous report on which Gabbard has focused. 

The angry man probably didn't know that. He did know that, whatever the hell he was talking about, the press corps had swallowed it like a dick—and their conduct now demands justice!

Part Two: "The media" said that Russia hacked the election!

Where did the stranger go from there? Proceeding from above, he now played tape of seven journalists making a crazy claim in the months and years after the 2016 election:

GUTFELD: What they did to all of us with this hoax is unforgivable and it demands justice. And now, they want us to forget that they ever said this:

[Videotape of seven journalists saying that Russia "hacked the election."]

GUTFELD: Like Macauley Culkin, that hasn't aged well.

[UNFLATTERING PHOT0 OF CULKIN]

But every single legacy new outlet ran with bogus headlines

[These three headlines appeared on the screen}

CNN: Russian hacking and the 2016 election

MSNBC: Why experts believe Russia hacked the 2016 election

Mother Jones: Russian election hacking was very serious.

Incredible! At least seven journalists had said that Russia "hacked the election!" Also, the angry man showed us three headlines which made the same claim!

In truth, it's almost impossible to get any stupider than this angry fellow. In fact, everyone agrees that the Russians did "hack" the 2016 election. 

The claim refers to the way Russian entities like its Internet Research Agency stole material from Democratic Party entities, then used those stolen materials to make Candidate Clinton look bad.

Everyone agrees about this! Here's a passage from the Republican-led Senate committee where this obvious fact is being discussed:

RUSSIAN HACKING OPERATIONS 

At the same time that the IRA operation began to focus on supporting candidate Trump in early 2016, the Russian government employed a second form of interference: cyber intrusions (hacking) and releases of hacked materials damaging to the Clinton Campaign. The Russian intelligence service known as the Main Intelligence Directorate of the General Staff of the Russian Army (GRU) carried out these operations.

In March 2016, the GRU began hacking the email accounts of Clinton Campaign volunteers and employees, including campaign chairman John Podesta. In April 2016, the GRU hacked into the computer networks of the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (DCCC) and the Democratic National Committee (DNC). The GRU stole hundreds of thousands of documents from the compromised email accounts and networks. Around the time that the DNC announced in mid-June 2016 the Russian government’s role in hacking its network, the GRU began disseminating stolen materials through the fictitious online personas “DCLeaks” and “Guccifer 2.0.” The GRU later released additional materials through the organization WikiLeaks. 

Every Republican senator, including acting chairman Rubio, agreed with that presentation. Everyone on the face of the earth understands these elementary facts—everyone except the Fox News Channel's resident nutcase, and the millions of people he propagandizes every night for $9 million per year.

Part Three: Konstatin Kilimnik

From there, the "cable news" star turned to an inane attack on Rachel Maddow. As he continued, Suzanne Scott's primal idiot told Fox viewers this:

GUTFELD: And who could forget our favorite Mark Cuban impersonator—

[PHOTOS OF RACHEL MADDOW AND MARK CUBAN]

—who found a new crush in this guy, Konstantin Kilimnik.

[There followed ten brief video clips of Maddow saying "Konstantin Kilimnik." All ten carried a date of May 2018, imaginably having been drawn from one single show.]

GUTFELD: If I didn't know any better, I'd think she had the hots for that guy.

But it's hard to believe that this was taken seriously. No wonder they want everyone to forget it. They're like a drunk coworker who wakes up the next day hoping his pals forget that he went home with the office hunchback. 

But while Trump was framed, these hacks earned a living off it, wrote books, even won awards. It was the biggest scam since those pills I bought that promised to make me taller.

What a scam, this idiot said. Maddow almost seemed to have fallen in love with "this guy, Konstantin Kilimnik." 

It's hard to believe that this was taken seriously, he said.  So you'll know, here's a chunk from Volume 5 of that Senate committee report in which Paul Manafort, Candidate Trump's campaign chairman, is being discussed:

[Chairman] Manafort hired and worked increasingly closely with a Russian national, Konstantin Kilimnik. Kilimnik is a Russian intelligence officer. Kilimnik became an integral part of Manafort's operations in Ukraine and Russia, serving as Manafort's primary liaison to Deripaska and eventually managing Manafort's office in Kyiv. Kilimnik and Manafort formed a close and lasting relationship that endured to the 2016 U.S. elections. and beyond. 

[...]

The Committee found that Manafort's presence on the Campaign and proximity to Trump created opportunities for Russian intelligence services to exert influence over, and acquire confidential information on, the Trump Campaign. Taken as a whole, Manafort's highlevel access and willingness to share information with individuals closely affiliated with the Russian intelligence services, particularly Kilimnik and associates of Oleg Deripaska, represented a grave counterintelligence threat. 

Every Republican senator agreed! Years later, there was Gutfeld, Suzanne's clown, disinforming millions of viewers—and insulting Maddow, who is becoming one of his standard targets—as his studio audience sheered.

The Russians disinformed the public in various ways the public during the 2016 election; Gutfeld performs the same service today. That said, is it humanly possible to get any dumber than what this corporate idiot had now said? 

He had told millions of people who don't know better that it was crazy when journalists said that the Russia "hacked the election." He had told those same people that it was crazy when Maddow spoke about "this guy, Konstantin Kilimnik."

His ugly insults rolled down like mighty waters as he peddled this nonsensical tripe. Now, it was time for him to summarize.

Here's the way he did that:

Part Four: "There needs to be scalps"

GUTFELD:  The New York Times and Washington Post won Pulitzers for spreading the hoax. It's like Lia Thomas being named female athlete of the year just because she could fill her urine sample cup from four feet away.

So today the media is like a junkie that made your life hell for ten years, and now suddenly they claim it is all behind them...So, should you forget the hell that they put you through? No, we can't let this go. They need to make serious amends because we're still living with the aftermath...There needs to be consequences... 

There needs to be scalps.

"There needs to be scalps," the termagant said. There needs to be scalps because of the fact that many journalists were seen in public making blindingly obvious statements of fact about the 2016 election.

(With apologies, we've omitted parts of his closing declamation. You can watch by clicking here.)

Greg Gutfeld is your neighbor and friend. We advise you to pity the child.

On the other hand, Suzanne Scott turns him loose every afternoon and then again every night. This corporate action is a cancer on the possibility of maintaining an American nation, or are we unable to see that?

We've shown you what he said in his "monologue" that night. He was surrounded by four stooges as he did

Gutfeld!: Thursday, July 24, 2025
Joe Germanotta: restaurant owner
Kennedy: former VJ
Guy Benson: Fox News contributor
Michael Loftus: comedian

Tomorrow, we'll show you what those stooges then said. If possible, it may have gotten even dumber and even worse as they took their turns.

Over here in Blue America, this is all ignored. Our stars' pay levels are still quite good.

To appearances, no one wants to wrestle with Fox:

Please keep moving along!

Tomorrow: What they actually said...