SURROUNDINGS: Farmers had milked her mom like a cow!

THURSDAY, MARCH 5, 2026

Watters and Gutfeld go off: Three nights before the war began, the State of the Union event was held. 

On this occasion, we wouldn't necessarily describe it as an "address." Over at the Wall Street Journal, Peggy Noonan didn't seem to care for the foolishness either. 

Headline included, her column started like this:

The Oprah State of the Union

The president’s State of the Union address came straight from the heart of Crazytown. It had everything—tears, cheers, spectacle. They handed out medals and honors like Oprah in the early 2000s: “You get a car! Everybody gets a car!” At one point I thought he was going to pull out a ceremonial sword and knight Kristi Noem. There was yelling and booing and people crying, it was big and rousing, boring and absurd. And important in some things it revealed.

Ten years in, and Democrats still don’t know how to handle Donald Trump. He used them as foils and they allowed it...

Noonan continued from there. 

We don't agree with every word Noonan said. We don't even agree, in every way, with what she said about (our view) the sheer stupidity involved in bringing the men's hockey team in from the cold that night. 

(Noonan: "When the gallery doors swung open and the triumphant U.S. Olympic men’s hockey team marched in, it was vulgar and fabulous.")

We don't agree with everything Noonan said about this "Crazytown" event. But the State of the Union was part of the surroundings as the move against Iran drew near. 

In our view, the sheer stupidity of our devolving political culture was on display that night. That event was part of the surroundings as the move on Iran drew near—but so was the delicious two-day event up north, the Chappaqua depositions. 

Dearest darlings, it was delicious! On Thursday and Friday of last week—late that night, the move on Iran would begin—the pair of Clintons would be deposed about a pair of sexual felons. 

Hillary Clinton would be deposed on Thursday; her husband would be deposed the following day. On The Five, the mutts were well pleased—and yes, the braindead behavior of Fox News Channel "cable news" shows was also part of the surroundings as the start of this war drew near. 

How will this war turn out? Left to our own soothsaying, we have no way to tell you. 

We've seen people who plainly aren't nuts voice approval of the undertaking. (General Clark, come on down!) But on the nation's most-watched "cable news" show, the mutts weren't trying to produce a framework of understanding about the situation in Iran or about anything else. 

Instead, the mugging and clowning about the depositions got started. On Thursday afternoon—one day away from war—the children on our most-watched "cable news" program had some excellent fun with Hillary Clinton's deposition, concerning which little was actually known at that point. 

The children people our most-watched show—but oh, what kind of cultural madness is this? After an utterly pointless pseudo-discussion, one of the culture's leading mutts closed the segment about Thursday's deposition by scrambling to work this in:

PERINO (2/26/26): All right. Jesse, last word?

WATTERS: This was just the appetizer. Bill's tomorrow, and that's where it's at. 

He was on the plane. He may have been on the island. And there's an allegation that he had an affair with Ghislaine Maxwell. So let's just hope they have their stories straight.

PERINO: All right. Well, that will wrap us on The Five...That's it for us. 

He rushed to include the "allegation." There's an allegation, the simpleton said—the simpleton who also serves as a propaganda messaging agent for the corporation which owns him. 

So it went as the nation's most-watched imitation of life went off the air that day. As of yesterday, the various mutts were still having their fun with last week's depositions, though it seemed fairly obvious that the biggest dumbass of them all had exactly zero idea what he was talking about.

By yesterday, the former "wrestler" who performs as "Tyrus" had had six days to get straight about these depositions. At the invaluable Rev, you can read the transcript of the million things Bill Clinton said, even including this:

QUESTION (2/27/26): Can you briefly, for the record, describe the nature and extent of your relationship with Ms. Maxwell?

CLINTON: Yes. It lasted longer and was more extensive than my relationship with Mr. Epstein, because Ghislaine Maxwell started going with a man named Ted Waitt, who had made a lot of money making the first sort of self-designed computers, and he was a big supporter of mine and the Clinton Foundation before he started seeing Ghislaine. 

We had been friends, and he was interested in particular in reducing pollution in the oceans. And so when she started going with him, I would see her from time to time.

QUESTION: And when did your relationship with Ms. Maxwell end?

CLINTON: I don't think I've seen her in a decade. It's been a long time. I don't know exactly when.

[...]

QUESTION: Do you have any recollection of what year it would've ended?

CLINTON: No, but when she was with Ted Waitt, she was— When we were kicking off [the Clinton Global Initiative], she was very interested in that and she participated, but I don't remember—I don't know. It's been ten, twelve years since I saw her. I don't remember when the last time was.

There's much more if you're interested. As best we can tell, he wasn't asked about the "allegation" with which Watters had managed to close the previous day's pathetic imitation of life. 

As for the former "wrestler," let the word go forth to the nations! Yesterday, he was presented to the world two times, first on The Five and then, five hours later, on Gutfeld! 

Uh-oh! During his smirking filibuster on The Five, it almost seemed he thought that the two Clintons had been present at the same time for a joint deposition. During his smirking on the Gutfeld! show, it seemed clear that that's what this big blowhard thought. 

It was all tied to his flyweight rumination about why Hillary Clinton became angry at one point during Thursday's event. All in all, it couldn't have been much dumber, though he may be willing to try.

That said, the misogyny-adjacent behavior is endless on these "cable news" shows. So it goes when Fox lets the dogs out each night, with every news org in Blue America agreeing to avert its gaze.

The sheer stupidity of these programs is their primary calling card. But especially on the Gutfeld! show, the truly astonishing ugliness also comes rushing in.

That ugly conduct was part of the surroundings last week as we approached our current war. Consider what that program's host said on last Thursday's program.

With apologies, a bit of background is required:

Unfortunately, Rosie O'Donnell's adult daughter, Chelsea O'Donnell, has been experiencing some legal problems related to addiction issues. 

Most news orgs have behaved in an appropriate way. In the manner which has become the trademark of the Gutfeld! show, the program's host decided to give the world this right at the start of last Thursday's program:

GUTFELD (2/26/26): Rosie O'Donnell's daughter Chelsea has been accused of assault after touching a man's genitals. 

Apparently, she never learned boundaries growing up watching farmers milk her mom.

It was one of his opening "jokes." He had joked about the same topic the night before, in a slightly less astonishing way.

When does a society decide it's time for conduct like this to go? In the matter of this "cable news" channel, this peculiar person's pathetic behavior has been enabled by Blue America every step of the way.

Please don't ask us to chronicle the endless ugliness of this primetime "cable news" program. "Jokes" about Rashida Tlaib's hairy face have been frequent in the past two weeks, as is the reliable norm.

(The ladies of the Fox News Channel just sit there as if nothing is happening. So do all the highly principled columnists at the New York Times.)

Last night, Obama was from Kenya again. Fox rolls this garbage can out each night. Blue America looks away.

The war began late Friday night. In the case of these "cable news" programs, it would be hard to chronicle the full extent of the gruesome surroundings.

Tomorrow: We no longer talk about this