THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S FICTIONS: Professor Matteson feels Jo's pain!

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 2020

Though Jo didn't feel it herself:
Anthropologists frequently pose the question, most often at 2 in the morning:

Were we humans—we so-called rational animals—ever really rational in our essence? Or was it just a succession of tribal fictions—scripted narrative all the way down?

In fairness to these future experts, they always draw a firm distinction between matters of technology and engineering as opposed to everything else. Early last month, they called our attention to Professor Matteson's essay in The Atlantic.

Frankly, how apt! Two weeks before that piece appeared, The Atlantic's David Sims had published a crackpot conversation with Aaron Sorkin, in which the two men reached several strange points of agreement.

Most strangely, the fellows agreed that Harper Lee's famous novel, To Kill A Mockingbird, ends with Atticus Finch covering up a murder—the murder of Bob Ewell! Stating the obvious, you'd pretty much have to be out of your mind to read the book that way.

(Earlier, it had been even stranger. In an essay in New York magazine, Sorkin had actually said that Lee's fictional Atticus Finch "believes in the fundamental goodness in everyone, even homicidal white supremacists." Sorkin quickly linked this very strange claim to Donald J. Trump's famous statement about there being "fine people on both sides." So it goes when the rational animal, at times of tribal agitation, sets out on the prowl.)

Sims and Sorkin voiced that strange belief about Atticus Finch on December 17. Two weeks later, Professor Matteson's piece appeared, in which he discussed Little Women.

Is the rational animal ever rational? Or is it always tribal script—narrative all the way down?

We can't answer your sensible question. But Professor Matteson, a Pulitzer-winning Alcott biographer, strangely told readers this:
MATTESON (1/1/20): Among children’s classics, Little Women is virtually unique in its lack of a personified villain. The prevalent reading of the novel is that the chief evil that must be fought and subdued is the flaw in each character’s own breast, whether Jo’s temper, Laurie’s laziness, or Beth’s shyness. While these inner struggles are amply addressed in the film, Gerwig convincingly proposes an alternative reading: A considerable source of pain in Alcott’s world is the disapproving masculine gaze, so often clad in the guise of moral judgment, that can bruise a woman’s self-esteem and steal her self-expression.

Alcott’s novel presents two powerful instances of such criticism. Laurie chides Meg for her attire at a party, which she considers beautiful and he deems immodest; and Professor Bhaer arraigns Jo for publishing lurid stories that he regards as a waste of her talent and that he fears will subvert her readers’ morals. In the novel, these scenes occur far apart, with no obvious linkage. Gerwig has heard the similarities between them; her film makes the two moments rhyme thematically and lingers on the hurt and indignation that the two men heedlessly cause.

What makes Gerwig’s take so notable is that she sees both sides of the situation with equal conviction. Laurie and Bhaer speak in good faith, yet are largely oblivious to the depth of the pain they are causing...
Forget the episode involving Laurie. Let's focus on Professor Bhaer, and on the power of script.

According to the real-life Professor Matteson, the fictional Professor Bhaer causes a great deal of pain in Alcott's novel. It happens when he "arraigns Jo for publishing lurid stories."

According to Matteson, the fictional Bhaer "heedlessly" causes a great deal of "hurt and indignation" when he exposes Jo to "the disapproving masculine gaze" in this manner. He's said to be "largely oblivious to the depth of the pain" he has caused. The professor bruises Jo's self-esteem and steals her self-expression.

In fairness to Professor Bhaer, at least he hasn't been accused of covering up a murder. In fairness to Professor Matteson, he gives a fairly accurate account of a set of events which occur in Greta Gerwig's "adaptation" of the Alcott book.

That said, these events don't occur in Louisa May Alcott's famous novel, which Matteson has presumably read.

Given his status as a Pulitzer-winning Alcott biographer, it's hard to believe that Professor Matteson hasn't read Alcott's actual book. Has his understanding been swept away by the narratives of the moment?

In Alcott's actual book, does Professor Bhaer engage in the hurtful conduct the real professor describes? Does he heedlessly cause hurt and indignation by arraigning Jo? Is he oblivious to the depth of the pain he has caused?

Sadly, no, that doesn't occur in Alcott's actual book.

That reinvented set of events is offered for our tribal pleasure in Gerwig's "updated" film. But a very different set of events and reactions unfolds in Alcott's actual novel. You can see this by forcing yourself to read Chapters 33 and 34 of her very old book.

In Alcott's actual book, Professor Bhaer never reads any of Jo's "sensation stories." He does tell her, at one point, that he disapproves of this tabloidy genre as a general matter, but it's already perfectly clear that Jo holds the same general view.

What's up with Jo's "sensation stories?" This is the way the scene is set at the start of Chapter 34, with Jo now working as a governess in New York City:
ALCOTT (chapter 34): Though very happy in the social atmosphere about her, and very busy with the daily work that earned her bread and made it sweeter for the effort, Jo still found time for literary labors. The purpose which now took possession of her was a natural one to a poor and ambitious girl, but the means she took to gain her end were not the best. She saw that money conferred power, money and power, therefore, she resolved to have, not to be used for herself alone, but for those whom she loved more than life. The dream of filling home with comforts, giving Beth everything she wanted, from strawberries in winter to an organ in her bedroom, going abroad herself, and always having more than enough, so that she might indulge in the luxury of charity, had been for years Jo's most cherished castle in the air.

The prize-story experience had seemed to open a way which might, after long traveling and much uphill work, lead to this delightful chateau en Espagne. But the novel disaster quenched her courage for a time, for public opinion is a giant which has frightened stouter-hearted Jacks on bigger beanstalks than hers. Like that immortal hero, she reposed awhile after the first attempt, which resulted in a tumble and the least lovely of the giant's treasures, if I remember rightly. But the "up again and take another" spirit was as strong in Jo as in Jack, so she scrambled up on the shady side this time and got more booty, but nearly left behind her what was far more precious than the moneybags.

She took to writing sensation stories, for in those dark ages, even all-perfect America read rubbish.
She told no one, but concocted a "thrilling tale", and boldly carried it herself to Mr. Dashwood, editor of the Weekly Volcano.
According to Alcott's text, Jo March had taken to writing rubbish in pursuit of money and power.

In our own modern times, many people who "adapt" famous texts are, of course, perhaps engaged in the same general pursuit. But it's clear in Alcott's text that Jo feels or knows that she shouldn't be producing such tabloidy "rubbish," and Alcott's narrator directly says the same thing.

If you fight your way through the whole of Chapter 34, you'll see the repeated appearance of questions concerning Jo's "conscience." In fact, Jo shares the professor's view of these tabloidy "sensation stories." She also knows that her parents wouldn't approve of such efforts.

As the chapter unfolds, Jo's regard for Professor Bhaer continues to grow. Things are quite different in Gerwig's film, where he rather rudely tells Jo that he disapproves of her stories.

Hotly, Jo tells the professor off. Instantly, she's called back to Concord, where her sister Beth has taken a turn for the worse.

These exciting modernized events don't occur in Alcott's book.

In Alcott's actual book, Jo goes to her room and burns her "rubbish" stories after her conversation with Professor Bhaer. But she isn't angry with Professor Bhaer; she agrees with his general assessment of "sensation stories:"
ALCOTT: [W]hen nothing remained of all her three month's work except a heap of ashes and the money in her lap, Jo looked sober, as she sat on the floor, wondering what she ought to do about her wages.

"I think I haven't done much harm yet, and may keep this to pay for my time," she said, after a long meditation, adding impatiently, "I almost wish I hadn't any conscience, it's so inconvenient. If I didn't care about doing right, and didn't feel uncomfortable when doing wrong, I should get on capitally. I can't help wishing sometimes, that Mother and Father hadn't been so particular about such things."

Ah, Jo, instead of wishing that, thank God that 'Father and Mother were particular', and pity from your heart those who have no such guardians
to hedge them round with principles which may seem like prison walls to impatient youth, but which will prove sure foundations to build character upon in womanhood.
Do you see any "indignation" there? We can't spot it either!

In fact, Jo agrees with Professor Bhaer's view, and so does Alcott's narrator. For ourselves, Jo's repeated thoughts about "conscience" recall the great female-oriented undercard in On the Waterfront, in which the Marlon Brando character rails against the Eva Marie Saint character's constant references to conscience, even after he has come to see 1) that she is a better person than he is, and 2) that he wants to be more like her.

In Gerwig's film, Jo thrillingly tells the professor off, and the pair part on bad terms. That isn't what happens in Alcott's book.

In Alcott's book, the professor continues to "help [Jo] in many ways, proving himself a true friend, and Jo was happy, for while her pen lay idle, she was learning other lessons besides German, and laying a foundation for the sensation story of her own life."

When Jo finally leaves for home, the professor is dreaming that he might some day win her love. She hasn't yet discovered the depth of her own feeling for him—it's skillfully signaled through both New York chapters—but Chapter 34 ends like this:
ALCOTT: Early as it was, he was at the station next morning to see Jo off, and thanks to him, she began her solitary journey with the pleasant memory of a familiar face smiling its farewell, a bunch of violets to keep her company, and best of all, the happy thought, "Well, the winter's gone, and I've written no books, earned no fortune, but I've made a friend worth having and I'll try to keep him all my life."
Professor B's in love. She still isn't—or, at the very least, it hasn't quite dawned on her yet.

In Gerwig's film, Jo angrily tells the professor off, then goes away on bad terms. According to leading experts, some people engage in such "adaptations"—produce such modernized "sensation stories"—in their own search for money and power!

This brings us back to Professor Matteson's odd presentation in The Atlantic. As with Sorkin, so too here, or so some experts have said.

At times of major tribal stress, tribal stories take control, these future experts have told us. Clear vision tends to disappear. It's replaced by the mandates of scripted tribal tales, leaving us with "narrative all the way down."

Atticus Finch is involved in a murder! And not only that—Professor Bhaer has heedlessly bruised Jo's self-esteem! Plus, the fellow is too fat, a key perspective we're able to gain at Vox.

"The human mind was wired this way," future experts have said. "This sort of thing rarely ended well," they've often despondently added.

Tomorrow: Toy story

Two different yet similar partings: When Jo finally leaves New York, it could be imagined that she's unaware of her actual feelings.

Professor Bhaer is plainly in love. It seems that Jo still isn't:
ALCOTT: Early as it was, he was at the station next morning to see Jo off, and thanks to him, she began her solitary journey with the pleasant memory of a familiar face smiling its farewell, a bunch of violets to keep her company, and best of all, the happy thought, "Well, the winter's gone, and I've written no books, earned no fortune, but I've made a friend worth having and I'll try to keep him all my life."
So Chapter 34 ends. We think of a certain lady's departure from Yalta in The Lady With the Lapdog, Chekhov's famous story.

Gurov will discover later that he's in love with the lady. But as her train leaves him behind, he still doesn't know this:
CHEKHOV: The train moved off rapidly, its lights soon vanished from sight, and a minute later there was no sound of it, as though everything had conspired together to end as quickly as possible that sweet delirium, that madness. Left alone on the platform, and gazing into the dark distance, Gurov listened to the chirrup of the grasshoppers and the hum of the telegraph wires, feeling as though he had only just waked up. And he thought, musing, that there had been another episode or adventure in his life, and it, too, was at an end, and nothing was left of it but a memory. He was moved, sad, and conscious of a slight remorse. This young woman whom he would never meet again had not been happy with him; he was genuinely warm and affectionate with her, but yet in his manner, his tone, and his caresses there had been a shade of light irony, the coarse condescension of a happy man who was, besides, almost twice her age. All the time she had called him kind, exceptional, lofty; obviously he had seemed to her different from what he really was, so he had unintentionally deceived her.

Here at the station was already a scent of autumn; it was a cold evening.

"It's time for me to go north," thought Gurov as he left the platform. "High time!"
So ends one part of the story. Later, the truth would emerge, within. Two different, quite similar partings.

There's no business like show business!

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2020

Or like show business punditry:
Was Parasite the best film of 2019?

We have no idea. Objectively, since there's really no such thing as a "best film" of any year, we'd say the answer is probably no.

What was last year'a best film? Such claims are wholly subjective.

On the other hand, some claims about major films almost seem to be evidence-based. Consider A. O. Scott's claims in this morning's New York Times about Parasite's amazing popularity with adoring audiences.

Scott was chatting with his fellow Times critics, Manohla Dargis and Wesley Morris. Few groups of narrators are more reliably unreliable. Along the way, Scott offered these gushing remarks about the current it-film:
SCOTT (2/11/20): Of course the triumph of “Parasite” goes beyond those precedents, but in other ways it’s an almost ideal Oscar movie. Admired by critics and adored by audiences. A box office hit all over the world. A wonderfully entertaining movie that tackles serious issues.

[...]

How can the [Oscar telecast] continue to attract a global audience? By focusing on the big-budget, IP-driven franchise movies that are Hollywood’s leading global export? That has been an obvious, dreary answer for quite some time, but “Parasite” suggests a different one. There’s a whole world of movies out there—exciting, surprising, popular movies—that deserve audiences and accolades in America.(Scott's italics)
There is no question that Parasite is widely "admired by critics." According to this compilation by Metacritic, it seems to have been the best reviewed film last year—indeed, the best reviewed film by far.

Parasite was picked as the year's best film by 77 of the critics monitored by Metacritic. Once Upon A Time in Hollywood finished second, with 38 "best film" picks.

Plainly, Parasite was widely "admired by critics." But has it been "adored by audiences?" Has it been a "popular" "box office hit all over the world?"

We don't know why Scott would make those gushing statements. Here's what the leading authority on Parasite says about its box office receipts as of the night of its Oscar win:
As of 9 February 2020, Parasite has grossed $35.5 million in the United States and Canada, and $132.1 million in other territories (including $72 million from South Korea), for a worldwide total of $167.6 million.
$35.5 million in the U.S. and Canada? Especially given the critical acclaim the film received, that isn't giant box office.

According to Box Office Mojo
, Parasite ranked #98 in box office receipts for 2019 as of New Year's Day 2020, following an October 11 release. At that time, it was poised between such giant hits as (the well-reviewed) Booksmart and Stuber—two other films which didn't bring in major bucks.

What does a box office hit really look like? Depending on what we're comparing to what, we'll show you where domestic receipts stand, at present, for some of last year'a films.

All data come from Box Office Mojo. We're leaving out quite a few of the year's biggest box office hits:
Domestic box office receipts, selected 2019 films:

Avengers Endgame: $858.4 million
The Lion King: $543.6 million
Star Wars Episode 9: $510.6 million
Captain Marvel: $426.8 million

Spider-Man Far from Home: $390.5 million
Joker: $335.2 million
Jumanji The Next Level: $298.5 million

Us: $175.1 million
Knives Out: $159.0 million
Once Upon A Time in Hollywood: $142.4 million
1917: $132.8 million
Ford v. Ferrari: $116.3 million
Hustlers: $105.0 million
Little Women: $102.7 million

Parasite: $35.5 million
Especially given the rave reviews, does Parasite look like a popular box office hit, one which has been adored by audiences here in the U.S.?

Parasite's domestic receipts will grow because of its Oscar win. We're not sure how many of those new attendees will actually like the widely praised film. That said, it simply wasn't "adored by audiences" or a "box office hit all over the world" as of last Sunday night.

Why did A. O. Scott say those things in this morning's Times? Did we mention the fact that he's a critic for the New York Times, whose critics may well be the planet's least reliable narrators?

Tomorrow, we'll offer one of our favorite Oscar pundit corrections of the past year—the correction which is appended to Scott's review of Little Women.

Needless to say, Scott loved the film, as was required by Hard Pundit Law. His overall assessment was, of course, a matter of judgment.

We thought the error he had to correct inserted a bit of unintentional humor into the year's widespread foolishness. It also may seem to go to a possible shortcoming with the viciously snubbed master film.

Without any question, Parasite has been hugely admired by critics. It hasn't yet been a box office hit, except in the New York Times, a place where everyone knows your name if you've been anointed, and a place where everything's possible.

THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S FICTIONS: Professor Matteson's peculiar remark!

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2020

#Punditrysopeculiar:
"De gustibus non est disputandum!" We believe Abraham Lincoln said that.

We thought of Lincoln's famous remark on Monday evening, January 6, 2020.

Shortly after 10 PM Eastern, Rachel was performing her "throw" to Lawrence. Candidate Castro had dropped out of the White House race, and he'd now endorsed Candidate Warren.

As the pair of cable friends chatted, Lawrence offered explosive remarks, with Rachel voicing agreement:
LAWRENCE (1/6/20): The one thing I was not surprised by was this particular endorsement, because knowing that they are all, except one, eventually going to drop out, and knowing that this is one of the most impressive groups of Democrat presidential candidates I've ever seen–

RACHEL: Yes.

LAWRENCE: My favorite question, actually, for all of them who come on the show, "What is the most interesting thing you've heard, best thing you've heard from one of the other candidates?"

RACHEL: That's very smart.
We won't make you read any more of the mandated friendly agreement. That said, Lawrence actually said it, and Rachel seemed to agree:

"This is one of the most impressive groups of Democrat presidential candidates I've ever seen."

Warning sirens began to wail in our sumptuous underground apartments as our youthful analysts started to cry. "That was a subjective judgment—almost a matter of taste," we quickly and thoughtfully told them.

Does Lawrence really think that this is one of the most impressive groups of Democrat candidates he has ever seen? Does Rachel really agree with him?

We don't know how to answer your questions. But everything is possible, and it always will be!

Our own view is somewhat different. We think this is a god-awful collection of amazingly beatable candidates.

That doesn't mean that one of these candidates might not reach the White House. But when we watched the bulk of last Friday night's debate, we were struck by how amazingly beatable these unlikely candidates seem.

Two front-runners are way too old; one is way too young. Another spent several decades claiming to be an American Indian.

That leaves Candidate Klobuchar, coming up on the outside, but lacking the kind of "charisma" (or "command presence") normally associated with candidates who manage to win.

(Candidate Yang still wants to give everyone $1000. That's $1000 per month!)

We think this collection of candidates is preternaturally awful. Still and all, that's a matter of judgment. Others may have different views.

On MSNBC, we're still being told how "exciting" and how "historic" recent events have been. It may be that Rachel's just selling the car, or it could be that she really believes this.

We bring to this the wisdom we're gaining from our recent exchanges with a group of future ancients. Future Anthropologists Huddled in Caves, a group of despondent future scholars, keep telling us that our society's ongoing headlong decline is simply a matter of anthropology—of the insufficient wiring of the human brain.

When it came to maintaining a modern society, we simply weren't up to the task! So these despondent future experts insist on saying, through the peculiar nocturnal submissions the haters refer to as dreams.

Has modern punditry utterly failed? Just yesterday, we took you back some twenty years, to the day when Don Imus—and Lesley stahl—made absolute fools of themselves as they tried to discuss the workings of the Iowa caucuses.

A remarkable set of pundit stampedes were underway at that time. In the last few months, we've seen a similar burst in the remarkable Scripted Group Punditry concerning last Sunday night's Oscars.

Future ancients tells us this about the highly scripted punditry we've heard. Given the way the human brain was wired, discussion of even the most worthy topics was destined to be performed in the dumbest possible manner.

Is it possible that this gloomy anthropological claim is actually correct? Tomorrow, we'll turn to a strange claim by Professor Matteson, a claim advanced in The Atlantic in a discussion of Greta Gerwig's very badly snubbed film:
MATTESON (1/1/20): Among children’s classics, Little Women is virtually unique in its lack of a personified villain. The prevalent reading of the novel is that the chief evil that must be fought and subdued is the flaw in each character’s own breast, whether Jo’s temper, Laurie’s laziness, or Beth’s shyness. While these inner struggles are amply addressed in the film, Gerwig convincingly proposes an alternative reading: A considerable source of pain in Alcott’s world is the disapproving masculine gaze, so often clad in the guise of moral judgment, that can bruise a woman’s self-esteem and steal her self-expression.

Alcott’s novel presents two powerful instances of such criticism. Laurie chides Meg for her attire at a party, which she considers beautiful and he deems immodest; and Professor Bhaer arraigns Jo for publishing lurid stories that he regards as a waste of her talent and that he fears will subvert her readers’ morals. In the novel, these scenes occur far apart, with no obvious linkage. Gerwig has heard the similarities between them; her film makes the two moments rhyme thematically and lingers on the hurt and indignation that the two men heedlessly cause.

What makes Gerwig’s take so notable is that she sees both sides of the situation with equal conviction. Laurie and Bhaer speak in good faith, yet are largely oblivious to the depth of the pain they are causing...
All hail the badly snubbed Gerwig! According to Professor Matteson, she managed to find a reading of Louisa May Alcott's famous though widely unread book which lets us recite a favored claim about "the masculine gaze."

According to the leading authority, Professor Matteson "won the 2008 Pulitzer Prize for Biography or Autobiography for his first book, Eden's Outcasts: The Story of Louisa May Alcott and Her Father."

On that basis, we feel sure that Professor Matteson has actually read Alcott's book. For that reason, we were puzzled by his account of the deep pain his fictional colleague, Professor Bhaer, is said to cause in the fictional episode to which he refers.

In search of the depth of the pain to which the actual professor alludes, we've searched and searched through the relevant chapter in Alcott's famous book.

We've found no such occurrence there. Experts claim that Professor Matteson has himself created a "fiction."

In his perpetually best-selling book, Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind, Professor Harari says that our war-inclined species, Homo sapiens, conquered all other human species because, though a set of chance mutations, we attained the ability to engage in "gossip" and to concoct, repeat and march to battle under standard group "fictions."

So it has been in the past few months. So it was in the fall of 1999, when some of the most consequential modern group fictions were being shouted from the rooftops by people like Lawrence, Chris and Maureen, supported by a cast of thousands.

No good deed ever goes unpunished! Also, even the most worthwhile values will be pursued in the dumbest possible way!

This is what the future ancients insist on despondently saying. The Oscar punditry of the past few months has struck us as a truly remarkable example of this future ancient wisdom.

It's all anthropology now! Or so these future scholars say. We're just along for the ride.

Tomorrow: Did Alcott have room for the pain?

Once upon a time...in Iowa with Don Imus!

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 10, 2020

Iowa caucuses explained:
Long ago and far away, Don Imus tried to explain the Iowa caucuses.

It was January 2000. Candidate Gore had just vanquished Candidate Bradley in the Hawkeye State.

Imus, who was huge at the time, had no earthly idea how the Iowa caucuses worked. Adhering to the rules of the game, he fell to belittling Gore.

Leslie Stahl came on as a guest; she was clueless too. Our big stars have always been like this! This wholly inescapable fact helps explain how we got here.

To enjoy our own award-winning consistency, you can just click here. Scroll down to these immortal words:

"Clueless in the morning"

BREAKING: Why did black voter turnout decline?

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 10, 2020

Princeton professor tries to explain in the New York Times:
Has the liberal intelligentsia ever been so unable to function?

We've been seeing it in the heavily scripted Oscar commentary of the past few weeks. We've been seeing it in the remarkably unhelpful election punditry.

Tomorrow, we'll return to full-time discussion of this existential dilemma. For today, consider what happened when the New York Times published the opinion column by the Princeton professor.

The professor sought to explain a deeply puzzling point. She sought to explain the decline in black voter turnout in the last presidential election.

According to the essay's headline, the Princeton professor blamed the decline on Barack Obama's "failure to deliver major changes." Sadly but typically, the column started like this:
TAYLOR (2/8/20): The sting of Hillary Clinton’s defeat in 2016 still hangs heavy over the Democratic Party. There has yet to emerge a consensus understanding of the party’s failure to beat an opponent who almost everyone assumed could be defeated. Some have focused on voter suppression, others on Russian interference. Mrs. Clinton continues to blame Bernie Sanders. But missing from the various theories is how Barack Obama’s tenure may also have contributed to voter disaffection because he failed to bring about the transformational changes he promised.

The dramatic contrast between him and his successor, Donald Trump, has, in some ways, created pressure on Democrats to focus only on Mr. Trump’s transgressions while ignoring other factors that may have contributed to his election. As the primary campaign ramped up last summer, for example, party insiders made clear they would vigorously challenge any scrutiny of Mr. Obama’s presidency. “Stay away from Barack Obama,” one said. A former aide to Mr. Obama, Neera Tanden, wrote on Twitter that Democratic candidates who “attack Obama are wrong and terrible.” She added, “Obama wasn’t perfect, but, come on, people, next to Trump, he kind of is.”

The perception of the “perfect Obama” is contradicted by black voter turnout in 2016: It declined for the first time in 20 years, falling to 60 percent from 67 percent in 2012. This surely cannot be attributed only to voter suppression or the lack of an African-American candidate on the ticket—after all, Mr. Obama framed Mrs. Clinton’s run as his so-called third term. It’s safe to presume that disillusionment with Mr. Obama’s record, even as people continued to admire him personally, is, to some degree, reflected in these turnout figures.
According to the Princeton professor, black voter turnout declined from 67 percent in 2012 to 60 percent in 2016. We're then told this:

"It's safe to presume that disillusionment with Mr. Obama’s record...is, to some degree, reflected in these turnout figures."

Is it safe to make that presumption? Obviously, yes, it is! It's safe to presume that any number of factors "are reflected," to some degree, in the decline in black turnout.

The key words there—"to some degree"—make this claim almost completely pointless. That said, we were struck by the professor's failure to offer a more complete set of data concerning black turnout.

An obvious question popped into our heads—what was black turnout like before Barack Obama was the Democratic nominee? Using the same census data she used, this is what black turnout looked like in the last four White House elections:
Black voter turnout under recent Dem nominees:
2016: 60 percent (Hillary Clinton)
2012: 67 percent (Barack Obama)
2008: 65 percent (Barack Obama)
2004: 60 percent (John Kerry)
In short, turnout rose with Obama as candidate, then declined to where it had been under Candidate Kerry. Putting it another way:

On its face, it isn't clear that there's anything here that anyone needs to explain.

In 2016, black turnout declined to where it had been the last time the Democratic nominee wasn't Barack Obama! The following data offer wider context:
Black voter turnout under previous Dem nominees:
2000: 57 percent (Al Gore)
1996: 53 percent (Bill Clinton)
1992: 59 percent (Bill Clinton)
Make of those numbers what you will. But according to the data in question, black turnout in 2016 was as high as it ever had been, except for the two elections when Obama was the candidate.

Why would anyone be surprised by the decline in the black turnout rate in 2016? Why would anyone feel the need to blame that turnout rate on "disillusionment with Mr. Obama’s record," as the Princeton professor has done?

We don't know, but that's the way the essay began when the New York Times decided to publish the work of the Princeton professor. As we've long noted, work like this is constantly offered in the New York Times.

More and more and more and more, it seems to us that our liberal tribe simply isn't up to the task of dealing with this, The Age of Trump.

Simply put, we're routinely unintelligent, we're highly scripted and we're sometimes remarkably silly. More and more often, The Others think we're dumb and/or offensive, often for reasons which are perfectly valid.

Today, we're offering one small example of The Way Our Highest Progressive Elites Are Strongly Inclined to Function. Tribal groups whose leadership functions this way may not be long for this world.

Our meta-question is this:

Can you imagine the possibility that our Ivy professors and our most famous newspaper just aren't especially sharp? More and more and more and more, that seems to us to be The Story of The Age.

Can we liberals bring ourselves to conceive of this possibility? According to waves of anthropologists, the human brain just isn't wired for such counterintuitive tasks.

Why did black turnout decline in 2016? We'll answer the question with one of our own:

Given everything we know about human affairs, why wouldn't that turnout rate have declined in 2016? Elite professors and flyweight newspapers might start by riddling us that!

The woods are lovely, dark and deep. Is it possible that we ourselves, over here in our liberal tents, just aren't sharp enough to deal with a figure like Trump?

Trump seems to be bumping up in the polls. Are we going to know how to win?

Starting tomorrow: The rational animal's fictions

Coming soon: Award-wining work! The rational animal's lair!

BREAKING: We're off on a mission of national import!

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 7, 2020

Therefore, no fish today:
Not unlike General Washington before us, we're off on a mission of national import, one with Oscar implications.

For this reason, we will have no fish today.


Who won Iowa?

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 6, 2020

Also, who lost clarity and common sense?
Who won Iowa, Sanders or Buttigieg?

Excitement builds as cable pundits keep asking the pointless question.

What makes the question pointless? For starters, Iowa isn't a "winner take all" state at this stage of the game. It doesn't matter "won won" in the obvious way it would in a winner-take-all situation.

Eventually, barges will deliver Monday evening's final data to the state party in Des Moines. Whatever the final totals (of various types) might turn out to be, Sanders and Buttigieg will emerge with roughly equal numbers of "state delegate equivalents," and with more than anyone else.

(By the way, good luck getting someone to explain what a "state delegate equivalent" is.)

Buttigieg and Sanders will get more state delegate equivalents than Warren or Biden will—but no one will get them all. On that basis, it doesn't matter who may have "won" by a handful of votes, except for purposes of spreading excitement around.

It also doesn't matter because Iowa is just one state. There are 49 other states, plus assorted districts, territories and isolated outposts.

Because there are 49 other states, it doesn't matter who got the most votes, by a narrow margin, in this one lone state. But just try telling that to the reporters and pundits who populate our mainstream press.

Those pundits! Instead of urging against a stampede based on votes in only one state, they're now playing their standard quadrennial role, suggesting that certain candidates must be on their way out the door because of what happened in Iowa.

How silly is that? Consider:

It's often noted that Iowa is an "unrepresentative" state. Beyond that, though, the selections made in its incomprehensible caucus system are made by a relatively small, unrepresentative sample of Iowa voters!

Despite a year of Iowa-humping within the upper-end press corps, the state's caucus process is so noxious that large portions of Iowa voters don't show up or take part. Consider one recent example:

In 2016, there were roughly 2.2 million registered voters in Iowa. In that year's November general election, 1.57 million of them actually showed up to vote.

But according to the two state parties, fewer than 360,000 people took part in that year's caucuses, even after we spent our standard full year blubbering about the devotion and dedication of Iowa's nonpareil, civic-minded voters. In each party, the vast majority of registered voters didn't take part in the caucuses.

In a rare manifestation, Daniel Bush (no relation) took notice of the routine low turnout at the caucuses in a report for the PBS NewsHour that year. Among other things, the gentleman offered this:
BUSH (1/27/16): Attending a caucus eats up the evening, making it hard for people who might like to participate but can’t rearrange their busy schedules to make time for a political event.

“You have to hope the car starts, the babysitter shows up, you’re not sick and there’s no blizzard,”
said Goldford, adding that it’s especially difficult for people who work at night and can’t take off for the caucuses, which start at 7 p.m.

As a result, the caucuses are dominated by Iowa’s most engaged primary voters—a small subset of liberals and religious conservatives in a largely white, rural state that is far less diverse than the country as a whole.
In short, the state of Iowa is "unrepresentative" to begin with. In turn, the caucuses are attended by a small, unrepresentative sample of its unrepresentative electorate!

That said, so what? On Tuesday morning, we saw NBC's Ali Vitali confidently asserting that "we know there are three tickets out of Iowa." They play it this way every four years, and nothing will ever stop them.

Despite impressions you may get on cable TV, very few of our failing systems have ever made actual sense. It's crazy to think that a small subset of Iowa voters should wring down the curtain on White House contenders, but major pundits play it that way every time.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but we the people aren't always perfectly sharp. Unfortunately, the people we see on our TV machines are several times less impressive.

Few things that we do make actual sense. It's their job not to notice!

THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S VALUES: Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 6, 2020

Tired book turned into tract:
For reasons which haven't been fully explained, Greta Gerwig decided to create yet another film bearing the name Little Women.

Such films are sometimes called "adaptations." In this case, Gerwig produced some ch-ch-changes to Louisa May Alcott's somewhat dated tale. To wit:

As everyone knows, Alcott's famous novel ends with its heroine, Jo March, marrying Professor Bhaer.

According to one of Gerwig's producers, this had to be ch-ch-ch-changed. "You know we can’t actually have her marry Professor Bhaer,” Gerwig is said to have said.

This resolution has produced a mysterious ending in Gerwig's film—an ending straight outta This Year at Marryin's Bad. Some viewers think Jo and Bhaer get married; others feel sure that they don't.

Whatever! Fanpersons agree that the ending is great, whatever it is that actually happens. The fact that you can't tell what happens is what makes this ending so great!

At any rate, the fact that Jo March can't get married is one of Gerwig's major ch-ch-ch-changes. A second, widely ballyhooed change involves Marmee's anger.

In Louisa May Alcott's actual book, Jo, then roughly 15, tells her mother that she (Jo) can't control "my dreadful temper." Thanks to a bit of (understandable) pique on Jo's part, her youngest sister has almost drowned. The following exchange occurs, with Jo speaking first:
ALCOTT (chapter 8): "You can't guess how bad it is! It seems as if I could do anything when I'm in a passion. I get so savage, I could hurt anyone and enjoy it. I'm afraid I shall do something dreadful some day, and spoil my life, and make everybody hate me. Oh, Mother, help me, do help me!"

"I will, my child, I will.
Don't cry so bitterly, but remember this day, and resolve with all your soul that you will never know another like it. Jo, dear, we all have our temptations, some far greater than yours, and it often takes us all our lives to conquer them. You think your temper is the worst in the world, but mine used to be just like it."

"Yours, Mother? Why, you are never angry!" And for the moment Jo forgot remorse in surprise.

"I've been trying to cure it for forty years, and have only succeeded in controlling it. I am angry nearly every day of my life, Jo, but I have learned not to show it..."
As you can see, much of the writing in this famous old text is in fact rather clunky. But Marmee's statement—"I am angry nearly every day of my life"—appears word for word in Gerwig's film, and it's been heralded, far and wide, as Marmee's complaint against sexist oppression.

Every critic praises Gerwig for diagnosing this hidden meaning in Alcott's famous text. Perhaps somewhat cynically, we'll guess that this widely recited interpretation was floated in the film's press release, or perhaps it simply was put into play by Gerwigs early interviews.

Whatever! According to major anthropologists, the rational animal always loved to repeat whatever the last twenty tribe members had said. So it has been in reviews of this film, with Gerwig praised for the greatness of the way she found the meaning in Marmee's remark.

For better or worse, Alcott's actual text doesn't support this interpretation is any conceivable manner. Indeed, how has Marmee learned to check her hasty words? Soon, this exchange occurs. Marmee is speaking first:
ALCOTT: "I've learned to check the hasty words that rise to my lips, and when I feel that they mean to break out against my will, I just go away for a minute, and give myself a little shake for being so weak and wicked," answered Mrs. March with a sigh and a smile, as she smoothed and fastened up Jo's disheveled hair.

"How did you learn to keep still? That is what troubles me, for the sharp words fly out before I know what I'm about, and the more I say the worse I get, till it's a pleasure to hurt people's feelings and say dreadful things. Tell me how you do it, Marmee dear."

"My good mother used to help me..."

"As you do us..." interrupted Jo, with a grateful kiss.

"But I lost her when I was a little older than you are, and for years had to struggle on alone, for I was too proud to confess my weakness to anyone else. I had a hard time, Jo, and shed a good many bitter tears over my failures, for in spite of my efforts I never seemed to get on. Then your father came, and I was so happy that I found it easy to be good. But by-and-by, when I had four little daughters round me and we were poor, then the old trouble began again, for I am not patient by nature, and it tried me very much to see my children wanting anything."

"Poor Mother! What helped you then?"

"Your father, Jo. He never loses patience, never doubts or complains
, but always hopes, and works and waits so cheerfully that one is ashamed to do otherwise before him. He helped and comforted me, and showed me that I must try to practice all the virtues I would have my little girls possess..."
Oof. Marmee was lucky enough to have the help of her cheerful husband! At any rate, nothing in Alcott's book suggests that Marmee's temper is meant to be seen as an expression of her oppression. This is one of the ch-ch-changes we're told that Gerwig engineered to make the book fit our own times.

Another of these ch-ch-changes involves Professor Bhaer's "harsh criticism" of Jo's writing. In Gerwig'a film, we see Professor Bhaer tell Jo, in no uncertain terms, that he doesn't approve of the "sensation stories" she is composing for what it, in effect, the tabloid press of the day.

Bhaer is remarkably direct. Jo tells him off in no uncertain terms, as any self-respecting person would do in the thoroughly enlightened modern world of today. But nothing like that actually happens in Alcott's actual book.

In Alcott's actual book, the professor hasn't seen any of the Jo's tabloid tales when he tells her that he disapproves of such work as a general matter. It's also abundantly clear that Jo agree with this critical judgment.

She has already voiced embarrassment at the fact that she writes such lurid "rubbish," and we've already seen her reproaching herself over the fact that her parents wouldn't approve. Not even good feminist Marmee!

After her exchange with Bhaer, Jo vows that she will never produce such tabloid trash again. At no point does she storm off in anger over criticism by the professor. Indeed, in Alcott's book, Jo is grateful for the fact that the wise professor has helped her see the problem with the "rubbish" (her term) she has been producing.

Jo is grateful to the professor. Indeed, we see her tell herself this about her lurid "sensation stories:"
ALCOTT: "They are trash, and will soon be worse trash if I go on, for each is more sensational than the last. I've gone blindly on, hurting myself and other people, for the sake of money. I know it's so, for I can't read this stuff in sober earnest without being horribly ashamed of it, and what should I do if they were seen at home or Mr. Bhaer got hold of them?"
Jo says she's been hurting other people for the sake of money! Think how conflicted she might have been over the amounts of money tabloid rubbish can produce today, on cable TV or in Hollywood!

In Alcott's book, Marmee's anger doesn't stem from societal oppression. The professor doesn't "harshly criticize" Jo, and she doesn't tell him off when he does.

The other change Gerwig affects involves the fat, unattractive Bhaer. In a remarkably instructive essay at Vox, followed by a remarkably instructive colloquy, Constance Grady instructs us in the values of our modern highly progressive progressives.

According to Grady, Jo's marriage to the appalling Bhaer has always lay at the heart of the book's "notorious problem ending." The professor is too old and too "stout;" he's also "unattractive." In the passage shown below, she helps us see the values with which our flailing, failing tribe is now apparently saddled:
GRADY (12/27/19): The end of Little Women sees its heroine, tomboyish and ambitious Jo, married off to the pointedly unromantic Friedrich Bhaer, a middle-aged and unattractive German professor who disapproves of the sensational stories she writes. And the character readers expect Jo to end up with, her charming best friend Laurie, marries Jo’s least favorite sister Amy instead.

And so, while generations of readers have loved Little Women and sighed over Little Women, they have also puzzled over that bizarre, unsatisfying ending. Why would Louisa May Alcott do such a thing to Jo? Why would she do such a thing to us?
According to the highly progressive Grady, Professor Bhaer is unattractive and middle-aged (according to Alcott's text, he's "almost 40" when he and Jo meet). He "disapproves of the sensational stories [Jo] writes." Two paragraphs later, Grady complains that the professor is "stout."

The professor is old and fat. Given our modern progressive values, that called for some ch-ch-ch-changes!

With that, along came Gerwig. Alcott thought she knew what we need, but Gerwig knows what we want:
GRADY: Little Women adaptations have struggled to provide satisfying answers to those questions, and generally they do so by working hard against the grain of Alcott’s writing. Laurie’s marriage to Amy generally gets glossed over as quickly as possible, while Bhaer generally gets transformed into a palatable romantic hero.

Most contemporary versions of Little Women, contra Alcott’s description of the professor as a middle-aged man who is both “rather stout” and also “plain and odd,” have cast Bhaer with a young and attractive actor. He also becomes less harsh toward Jo’s writing...

Gerwig’s Little Women follows some of the path laid out before it by previous adaptations. Gerwig, too, makes Bhaer younger and sexier than he is in Alcott’s novel.
The professor wasn't palatable! Like all the other Tinseltown types, heroic Gerwig has made him "younger and sexier." We fiery modern-day progressives can thus breathe a sigh of relief.

We leave our campus tomorrow morning on an Oscar-related mission of extreme national import. For weekend study, we leave a possible reading assignment:

In chapters 33 and 34, Alcott actually does a skillful job showing us the development of Jo's attraction to Bhaer.

In chapter 33, we read her letters home from her new job in New York—letters in which she keeps describing the professor's various fine qualities. We learn that he has even gifted here with volumes of Shakespeare. This is some of the best writing in Alcott's book—and it's easy to make out the drift of what Jo describes in her letters.

In chapter 34, the exchange about the rubbishy "sensation stories" occurs. But all through that chapter, in several episodes, Jo's growing admiration for the professor only becomes more obvious. With how much clarity did poor Alcott have to spell it out?
ALCOTT (chapter 34): I don't know whether the study of Shakespeare helped her to read character, or the natural instinct of a woman for what was honest, brave, and strong, but while endowing her imaginary heroes with every perfection under the sun, Jo was discovering a live hero, who interested her in spite of many human imperfections. Mr. Bhaer, in one of their conversations, had advised her to study simple, true, and lovely characters, wherever she found them, as good training for a writer. Jo took him at his word, for she coolly turned round and studied him—a proceeding which would have much surprised him, had he known it, for the worthy Professor was very humble in his own conceit.
Jo was discovering a live hero. As she coolly turns round and studies him, Alcott describes a long list of virtues she finds in this unattractive man.

Later, Jo and Fatso marry, creating this allegedly beloved book's "notorious problem ending." Even worse, they open a school for destitute children! Why would someone do that?

Progressives like Grady and Gerwig can't seem to find value in such tedious conduct. They want the professor younger and sexier. With these values, our failing tribe keeps marching forward, often while being exposed to justifiable ridicule by the grateful propagandists at Fox.

The punditry surrounding Gerwig's "adaptation" has been deeply instructive. Simply put, nothing is too dumb or too unclear for us to assert it as obvious fact—and Fox is eager to take our nonsense and tell The Others about it.

The professor was honest, brave and strong, but he was also too fat. We may offer a few more thoughts about this mass of punditry next week; a great deal remains to be said. But oh what kind of progressive values are these, which go from dumb and deeply unattractive to much worse?

What Alyssa Rosenberg seems to have seen!

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 5, 2020

We thought we saw it too:
Long ago and far away—this may take us back to the late 1980s!—we sat before a TV set with a young relative who was, as the memory flies, something like 8 years old.

Skanky MTV videos were on. The message concerning the role of young women was blindingly obvious. We recall feeling sorry for our young relative, for the messaging being delivered to her at such a young age.

If her brother had been there, we would have felt sorry for him as well. On the brighter side, skanky producers and skanky "artists" were lining their pockets with cash.

On Sunday evening, the Washington Post's Alyssa Rosenberg seems to have had a similar reaction to the Super Bowl halftime show. When yesterday's column appeared, we'd also say that she seemed to be trying to say a good deal less than what she actually thought:
ROSENBERG (2/3/20): The show, starring Shakira and Jennifer Lopez, was intended to accomplish a number of things: to boost the National Football League’s lagging Latino viewership, to nod to Miami’s Latino cultural traditions and to provide a spectacle more engaging than last year’s wholly generic performance by Maroon 5. The two Latina headliners sparked conversations about everything from the role of zaghrouta in Arabic cultures to Puerto Rico’s essential Americanness.

But one debate overshadowed the rest: whether Shakira and Lopez had dominated the stage—or been demeaned by a show that was undeniably sexy.

[...]

J-Lo entered the stage on a stripper pole, wearing leather chaps that gave way to a bedazzled, barely there bodysuit, while Shakira’s already tiny outfit shrank as the night went on. But the singers had to navigate more than quick costume changes and shifting sets: They were performing their way through a thorny set of norms.
Rosenberg gave us two choices. Had the two women "dominated the stage?" Or had they "been demeaned" by the show, in which one of them entered the stage on a stripper pole?

Is a third choice possible? Did the two women present a misogynist-leaning spectacle, increasing their fame as they did? Or is it simply all in good fun to "enter the stage on a pole?"

(Opinions on that may differ.)

Rosenberg implies that Lopez may have been demeaned by the show, not that she may have demeaned herself and worked against the best interests of women and children and men. Has progressive sexual politics possibly slid a couple of steps steps when that third possibility can't even be voiced at this point?

Presumably, this is the part, later on in the column, where we possibly find the two women being demeaned—demeaned by Fox, no less:
ROSENBERG: Shakira’s and J-Lo’s costumes stayed firmly in place. But Fox seemed determine to remove all mystery anyway, aiming cameras at their crotches so frequently that I actually lost count. The network’s fixation seemed to take inspiration from Bruce Springsteen’s fly-first slide at the camera during the Super Bowl halftime show in 2009. Then, Springsteen’s sudden genital takeover of America’s television screens felt like a boyish act of exuberance. This time, Fox’s crotch fixation brought on a case of mild moral panic.
Did the two women in question not know that their crotches were going to be featured in that way? Putting it another way, do Shakira and Lopez lack agency?

There was a time when feminism would have seen this show for what it possibly was. Rosenberg seems to have seen it for what it may have been, but it almost seems she no longer felt that she could speak directly.

Elsewhere at the Washington Post
, Emily Codik stressed the two performers' agency. No one told them what to wear!

Wherever you think the ultimate merits lie, we were struck by the way Codik's logic crashed and burned surrounding the question of what it means to see a performance as "objectifying or belittling to women."

Was Sunday evening's halftime show "objectifying or belittling to women?" We'd be inclined to say it was, but we were most struck by Rosenberg's apparent inability even to offer that for consideration as a third possible option.

Final point:

Our young relative turned out fine. But as we read the papers today, it seemed to us that many young woman have had a much harder time with our routinely repellent sexual culture.

On the brighter side, people make a lot of dough. There's always a brighter side to things when the costumes are barely there!

THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S VALUES: VanDerWeff makes startling admission!

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 5, 2020

Viewers confused by great film:
Never let it be said that the men and women of Vox have failed to promote Greta Gerwig's Little Women.

In a fascinating display of tribal propagandistics, the film became a cause celebre when it failed to receive sufficient award nominations from the Screen Actors Guild and from the Golden Globes.

When Gerwig didn't get an Oscar nomination as Best Director, that was an obvious outrage too. At Vox, the voices swung into action:
Constance Grady, 12/14/19:
Why schools refuse to treat Little Women as a great American novel

And the rest of the week’s best writing on books and related subjects.

Alissa Wilkinson, 12/20/19:
Greta Gerwig’s Little Women adaptation is genuinely extraordinary

The new movie doesn’t “update” the novel. It does something much better.

Grady, 12/27/19:
The power of Greta Gerwig’s Little Women is that it doesn’t pretend its marriages are romantic

Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women has an intentionally unsatisfying ending. Greta Gerwig weaponizes it.

Wilkinson, Grady and Haggerty, 1/24/20:
Greta Gerwig’s fresh take on Little Women won’t win Best Picture, but it should

Our roundtable discusses the Oscar chances for Greta Gerwig’s beautiful adaptation of a beloved old story.
Full disclosure! In the January 24 colloquy, no one actually said that Little Women should win the Oscar for Best Picture. Some headline writer apparently thought that bogus claim improved the sense of sweet outrage.

Meanwhile, it was in the December 27 piece that we learned the reason why people who love Alcott's book hate its ending so much. Jo March shouldn't have married Professor Bhaer because the fellow's too fat! See yesterday's report.

We'll return to that remarkably instructive claim in tomorrow's report. For today, we'll focus on a remarkably brave admission which has now been made at Vox.

In the past few days, the site's fanpunditry has continued. The essays in question are these:
Alex Abad-Santos, 2/3/20:
Greta Gerwig’s Little Women convinced me I would die for Amy March

Greta Gerwig’s Little Women dared to imagine a story where Amy isn’t a villain.

Emily Todd VanDerWerff, 2/3/20:
Why Little Women and The Witcher are kind of the same

Jumbled timeline storytelling is becoming more and more popular, especially on TV.
In the first of these new essays, Abad-Santos salutes Gerwig's courage in creating a version of Amy March the viewer can actually like.

His opening passage gives us a sense of how fraught these discussions have been Over Here within our failing progressive tribe. We also see the lockstep veneration of Gerwig which has widely arisen—and, perhaps, the intellectual caliber of our underperforming tribe:
ABAD-SANTOS (2/3/20): I never read Little Women growing up (the boys in my middle school were pushed to read Hatchet and Call of the Wild), nor have I seen the iconic 1994 Winona Ryder-led touchstone. Which is why I was surprised to learn that, after watching Greta Gerwig’s splendid adaptation and feverishly talking about it with anyone that would give me a chance, Amy March (played by Florence Pugh) has not historically been a fan favorite.

In fact, the youngest March sister is far from beloved: Amy March, prior to Gerwig’s adaptation, has traditionally been seen as the novel’s villain.

My gushing over Pugh’s performance; my love for Amy’s “economic proposition” scene; and my proclamations that Amy’s ambition to marry rich and live a good life with Timothee Chalamet spoke to my soul were met with some reproach. This more empathetic, even likable version of her character never existed in Little Women, I was told, until now.

[...]

[N]ow, after listening to my friends rip Amy’s behavior to shreds and then reading the novel, I completely agree with the OG Amy haters. Yet that character bears little resemblance to the one I fell in love with watching Greta Gerwig’s version of the film. And knowing how Amy was originally portrayed only makes me love the first Amy March I met, Florence Pugh’s Amy, that much more. Gerwig and Pugh’s appreciation for Alcott and Amy, and the more textured take on the character we get as a result, is the single best thing about this fantastic movie.
Yesterday, we learned from Grady's 12/27 piece that Jo March shouldn't have married Professor Bhaer because Bhaear was unattractive and fat. Today, Abad-Santos extends the general picture as he applauds Amy March for her "ambition to marry rich."

In these ways, we may perhaps learn about current "progressive" values.

That said, does Abad-Santos' "gushing" over this "fantastic" film rise to the level of scholarship one might expect from the liberal intelligentsia? Is it possible that a tribe which has reduced itself to this level has, over the many years, helped buy itself a Trump?

Such assessments are always subjective. That said, the tributes to Gerwig's fantastic and splendid adaptation continue to roll in at Vox.

With that, we move on to the VanDerWerff piece—and good God! Speaking of daring, did she actually dare to say it? As she starts, does VanDerWerff say that many people found Gerwig's film confusing?
VANDERWERFF (2/3/20): Over the holidays, I had a truly unexpected realization: People were having the same major complaint about Netflix’s weirdo fantasy The Witcher as they were about director Greta Gerwig’s sweet-tempered adaptation of Little Women. Despite the former garnering incredibly mixed reviews (though solid viewership, at least according to Netflix) and the latter becoming one of the most beloved movies of the year (by critics and audiences), it wasn’t hard for me to find folks on social media asking just what was going on in either of them.

Little Women got less of this confused reaction, which makes sense. It is, after all, based on a beloved American novel that had been adapted numerous times before Gerwig’s movie. But even with that in its corner, the movie’s time-jumbled narrative, in which it leaps between present and past with thrilling abandon, filling in gaps as the story goes, left at least some viewers confused.

“Gerwig has thrown linear storytelling to the wind
, and opted for a series of unidentified flashbacks and flash forwards. But in a chronicle with so many characters and locales as Little Women, that’s a great disservice to anyone who’s new to it all,” wrote critic Ed Symkus, who’s actually familiar with the story. But Symkus fears that those who aren’t as familiar will be too confused by the film to properly enjoy it.
In an earlier post, we reposted comments by various people who did in fact find Gerwig's film confusing. To review those remarks, just click here.

For ourselves, we've seen Gerwig's well-reviewed film three separate times. The first time, we found its endless time shifts extremely confusing, so we went back and skimmed the novel. We also rewatched Gillian Armstrong's 1994 Little Women, which starts in the beginning and moves on toward the end.

Thus fortified, we went back to see Gerwig's film two additional times. Even the third time we watched the film, we still found it confusing. To us, it still seemed like an ambitious screenplay which had massively failed.

That's the way it seemed to us—but Academy screenwriters disagreed, or possibly bowed to societal pressure. They gave Gerwig a nomination for Best Adapted Screenplay. Misogynists at the Golden Globes had denied her this honor.

VanDerWerff goes on to offer an explanation for why some people have found Gerwig's film confusing. According to VanDerWerff, they haven't watched enough of the modern TV shows whose story-lines jump around in a similar manner.

Is that why a significant number of people have found the film confusing? Everything is possible! Along the way, VanDerWerff almost seems to cop to a tiny bit of initial doubt herself:

"I loved Little Women, but as I left the theater, I found myself wondering why it was assembled nonchronologically," she bravely admits.

She goes on to become the ten millionth writer to say that you can tell where the story line is by the length of Amy's bangs. And good news! By the end of her essay, she agrees that Gerwig has assembled the greatest film ever:

"The more I’ve thought about Little Women’s story construction, the more I’ve come to love it."

Are such happy critical endings now required by Hard Tribal Law? Again, you're asking a sensible question, but one which can't be answered.

Today, we extend all praise to VanDerWerff for acknowledging the fact that a substantial number of people found Little Women confusing. When true believers go on a stampede, such heresies are rarely voiced.

That said, we continue to be amazed by the caliber of the work being done at Vox. Tomorrow, we'll return to Grady's heartfelt claim that Professor Bhaer was too f*cking fat for beloved Jo to marry.

We'll take a longer look at Alcott's text in search of comprehension. But uh-oh! According to experts with whom we consult, when progressives voices express such values, a Trump won't be far behind.

Tomorrow: Why did Jo marry a fatso like Bhaer? In search of modern progressive values, we take a fuller look at Alcott's text

As the general breakdown became more apparent...

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2020

...the caucuses finally broke down:
According to Future Historians Living in Trees, the following points were overlooked in real time, yet they were all portentous:

The Big 10 now had fourteen members. The Big 12 had only ten!

When the New York Times editorial board tried to craft an endorsement, they endorsed two (2) different candidates in a campaign only one could win.

The day before the Iowa caucuses, The Des Moines Register had to scrap its traditional, "widely-anticipated," day-before statewide poll. Unanswered was an obvious question:

Why would anyone want to release a potentially influential poll one day before an election?

On the very next day, and at long last, the caucuses finally broke down. Unanswered was a decades-old question:

Why did anyone ever decide to conduct this election this way?

The future scholars of whom we speak said these events were all of a piece. Then too, they mentioned the mainstream punditry concerning the deeply empowering Super Bowl halftime show.

In this morning's Washington Post, Alyssa Rosenberg challenged every upper-end hack in the house! For the record, we're taking Rosenberg's side on this matter, even though she undercut her own account of what she thought she saw.

In our view, Rosenberg got it right! Then too, her newspaper also had this.

Have we mentioned the fact that Professor Bhaer was too freakin' fat for marriage? These are the ever-shifting values of our own failing liberal tribe.

THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S VALUES: He was a teapot, short and stout!

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2020

Resisting a "problem marriage:"
Louisa May Alcott's actual book ends in an uplifting manner.

Its heroine, Jo March, has married a man she respects and admires. The two of them even go so far as to open a school for destitute boys!

It's obvious why the school for the poor wouldn't "sell" to Us Liberals Today. After all, if there's one thing we've unintentionally demonstrated at this site, it would have to be this:

You can't get us liberals, or the upper-end mainstream press, to pay any real attention to the state of our low-income schools!

At any rate, Louisa May Alcott's actual book ends with the creation of a school for destitute boys. By the time Greta Gerwig came along, it was obvious that no modern liberal would spend good money to sit through a film which seemed to embrace such values.

That said, Gerwig took a second, less obvious approach to the way Alcott's book actually ends. As we noted last week, producer Amy Pascal described this second shift to the New York Times' Jessica Bennett:
BENNETT (1/8/20): “One of the first things Greta said to me was, ‘You know we can’t actually have her marry Professor Bhaer,’” said Pascal.
Say what? In Gerwig's film, Jo March couldn’t actually marry Professor Bhaer? Why the Sam or Notting Hill not?

An elaborate theory lies behind this decision to change the basic events which take place in Alcott's famous book. At moments like these, we get to think about the meaning of the term "adaptation." But we also get to ruminated about our liberal tribe's current values, which sometimes might seem rather poor.

Why couldn't Jo March marry Bhaer? As an initial point of reference, Bennett's piece in the New York Times runs beneath these headlines:
This Is ‘Little Women’ for a New Era
The characters are ambitious, angry and they have agency. How Greta Gerwig adapted a 150-year-old text for our time.
According to this presentation, Gerwig's film creates a Little Women for "a new era"—our own. While keeping the names of Alcott's famous characters and retaining the famous name of her book, Gerwig is reinventing Alcott's book to make it All About Us.

This means that its famous female characters will be ambitious and angry, and it means that they'll have agency. By whatever calculation. Jo's decision to start a school for destitute boys will no longer count as representative of such traits. Neither will her decision to marry Professor Bhaer.

Why can't Jo marry Bhaer any more? A visit to the scribes of Vox may help us answer this question.

As elsewhere, Gerwig's well-reviewed film wasn't ignored at Vox. Five days before the film was released, the site ran the first of four long pieces about the its transplendent greatness:
Alissa Wilkinson, 12/20/19:
Greta Gerwig’s Little Women adaptation is genuinely extraordinary

The new movie doesn’t “update” the novel. It does something much better.
This particular adaptation had gone beyond a mere updating.
Should film adaptations "update" source novels at all? Presumably, that's a matter of opinion. It's also true that such "updating" can be executed in various ways.

At any rate, you can read Wilkinson's gushing assessment here. One week later, along came Constance Grady, offering a lengthy essay which may help us think about our modern "liberal/progressive" values:
Constance Grady, 12/27/19:
The power of Greta Gerwig’s Little Women is that it doesn’t pretend its marriages are romantic

Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women has an intentionally unsatisfying ending. Greta Gerwig weaponizes it.
Grady pulls no punches in her hard-hitting assessment. And sure enough! Right in her opening paragraph, she describes the "insurmountable problem" at the heart of Alcott's famous novel.

As it turns out, this insurmountable problem involves Jo's marriage to Bhaer:
GRADY (12/27/19): The insurmountable problem with Little Women—the one that’s had its fans in fits ever since its second volume was published in 1869, that every Little Women adaptation wrestles with—is that its climactic marriages are so profoundly unsatisfying. But Greta Gerwig’s take on Little Women, out now in theaters, is the first adaptation of the book to truly solve that problem—and it does so by leaning into everything fans dislike about those marriages, and amplifying it.

The end of Little Women sees its heroine, tomboyish and ambitious Jo, married off to the pointedly unromantic Friedrich Bhaer, a middle-aged and unattractive German professor who disapproves of the sensational stories she writes. And the character readers expect Jo to end up with, her charming best friend Laurie, marries Jo’s least favorite sister Amy instead.

And so, while generations of readers have loved Little Women and sighed over Little Women, they have also puzzled over that bizarre, unsatisfying ending. Why would Louisa May Alcott do such a thing to Jo? Why would she do such a thing to us?
Grady pulls no punches. Generations of readers have loved Alcott's book while hating those horrible marriages (plural).

Worst of all is the marriage which ends the book—Jo's bizarre, unsatisfying marriage to a German professor who is "unattractive."

Plus, he's middle-aged! Why did Alcott do this to us? Progressive minds want to know!

Before the week is done, we expect to offer text from Alcott's actual book which might start to provide an actual fictional answer to this vexing age-old question. First, though, let's get clear on the nature of the complaint being voiced at Vox.

We've already learned that Professor Bhaer is middle-aged and unattractive. He's also unromantic—"pointedly so," we're told.

As she continues, Grady helps us understand what's so awful about this marriage. While possibly misquoting the book at one point, she reveals an additional troubling fact—the German professor in question is "stout," another word for fat:
GRADY (continuing directly): Little Women adaptations have struggled to provide satisfying answers to those questions, and generally they do so by working hard against the grain of Alcott’s writing. Laurie’s marriage to Amy generally gets glossed over as quickly as possible, while Bhaer generally gets transformed into a palatable romantic hero.

Most contemporary versions of Little Women, contra Alcott’s description of the professor as a middle-aged man who is both “rather stout” and also “plain and odd,” have cast Bhaer with a young and attractive actor.
He also becomes less harsh toward Jo’s writing...

Gerwig’s Little Women follows some of the path laid out before it by previous adaptations. Gerwig, too, makes Bhaer younger and sexier than he is in Alcott’s novel. And she, too, reinterprets his criticism of Jo’s writing: Now, instead of moralizing to her, Bhaer is giving Jo constructive feedback because he respects her and her talent enough to be brutally honest with her.
Tomorrow, we'll examine the claim concerning Bhaer's "criticism of Jo's writing." For today, we'll only note the additional log Grady has thrown on the fire:

Professor Bhaer is "stout," we're now told, and he apparently isn't "sexy" enough! How in the world could Alcott have visited this horrible match upon us modern progressives?

For the record, Alcott's book doesn't seem to describe the professor as "plain and odd."

At least in the Gutenberg text which appears online, the professor is described, at one point, as being "plain and peculiar." But the description occurs in this longer passage, in which the reader is starting to be shown the basis for the eventual marriage:
ALCOTT (chapter 34): Why everybody liked him was what puzzled Jo, at first. He was neither rich nor great, young nor handsome, in no respect what is called fascinating, imposing, or brilliant, and yet he was as attractive as a genial fire, and people seemed to gather about him as naturally as about a warm hearth. He was poor, yet always appeared to be giving something away; a stranger, yet everyone was his friend; no longer young, but as happy-hearted as a boy; plain and peculiar, yet his face looked beautiful to many, and his oddities were freely forgiven for his sake. Jo often watched him, trying to discover the charm, and at last decided that it was benevolence which worked the miracle....The pleasant curves about his mouth were the memorials of many friendly words and cheery laughs, his eyes were never cold or hard, and his big hand had a warm, strong grasp that was more expressive than words.
Out of that description of the birth of deep admiration, the modern progressive pulls the damning information that the professor is "plain and peculiar." Given our more advanced modern values, we want someone a little bit sexier, more fit for romcom duty.

Before this foreshortened Oscar week is done, we plan to show you more of the writing which explains this (fictional) match. Having said that, good God!

We all understand that modern progressives could never find value in the idea that two fictional people decide to start a school for destitute children. But did you know that we've reached the point where a "problem marriage" (Grady's comical term) can consist in the fact that the gentleman—while "attractive as a genial fire"—is unacceptably fat?

After reading Grady's piece, the analysts turned to us, uncomprehending. Then, they glumly borrowed from Dylan:

"What kind of progressive values are these," they sighed, "which go from bad to worse?"

Tomorrow: For a new era! Marmee's reimagined anger and Bhaer's reimagined remarks

Iowa caucuses, Super Bowl viewers!

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 2020

Numbers that aren't what they seem:
This evening, we're celebrating one of our dumbest national rituals—the quadrennial Iowa caucuses.

No one can explain how they actually work. No one even attempts to explains why they work that way. To maintain belief in the reasonableness of the system, journalists avoid taking note of the very small number of Iowa voters who actually take part.

As with so many of our failing systems, the whole thing is a gong show, a rather embarrassing mess.

We decided to skip this topic today since all such discussion is pointless. That said, the general topic was called to mind by this irrelevant and/or misleading post at New York magazine:
2:44 P.M.
That’s a lot of people

According to FOX Sports, across all platforms, 102 million viewers tuned in to Super Bowl LIV.

That number makes it the 10th most-watched Super Bowl in history.
—@frntofficesport
The post provides this link.

As presented, that post doesn't quite say what it seems to say. Here's why we say that:

The post seems to suggest that this was a highly-watched Super Bowl—the 10th most-watched out of LIV (54)! But are we basing that statement on total viewers? If so, that "10th most-watched" designation doesn't seem to be super-impressive.

Here's why:

The first Super Bowl was held in 1967. The nation's population was a smidge under 200 million.

Today, it's roughly 330 million. Our total population is much bigger today!

For most purposes, it doesn't make sense to compare total viewers over time without accounting for the large gain in total population. Are we supposed to be surprised to learn that this year's viewership exceeded that of the early years, when the total available viewership was so much smaller?

There are a million ways to mishandle data in the naked city. Even among our "educated" elites, we rational animals have a very strong tendency to get around to them all.

That said, tonight is one of the dumbest nights of the year. Just imagine! Our presidents are selected by the people who don't value their time enough to avoid the unexplained drudgery of attendance at the Iowa caucuses!

(Hat tip: Bill Maher, for a vaguely related ad lib from several decades ago.)

Plus, no secret ballot! Unlike in modern comment threads, everyone gets to know!

Our systems are creaking and breaking down. On cable, you're rarely told.

THE RATIONAL ANIMAL'S VALUES: Who cares about destitution?

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 2020

Contemporary values of Vox:
We've tried, but we haven't quite succeeded! We haven't quite made it past the comments about the poverty—the poverty which isn't quite seen in the lionized film.

The film in question is Greta Gerwig's new version of Little Women. The comments were made in passing at Vox, early in a hagiographic discussion of the Oscar-nominated film.

Eventually, the three fanpersons discussing the film would complain about the way Gerwig was robbed when she wasn't nominated for a Best Director Oscar. Someone at Vox then put a bogus headline on the discussion—a bogus headline which amped up what the three fanpersons had said.

Increasingly, so it goes when liberals like us pretend to be doing journalism. Still, the comments about the poverty pretty much stuck in our craw.

The comment in question came right at the start of the lengthy discussion. Bogus headline included, the discussion started like this:
Greta Gerwig’s fresh take on Little Women won’t win Best Picture, but it should

WILKINSON: I have all faith in Greta Gerwig, but even I was a little worried when this project was announced! I grew up reading the Little Women novels and watching the film adaptations, especially the 1994 version, which was one of maybe six VHS films I owned growing up.

But the new adaptation delivered even better than I could have imagined. The cast is marvelous, but it’s Gerwig herself who really made it sing, finding a unique way into the story that preserved the joy of the earlier adaptations while also teasing out elements that were there all along but hadn’t been emphasized before.

What for you were the film’s biggest revelations or realizations? What was the moment at which you realized what she was doing?

HAGGERTY: I’m a Little Women diehard...so when I heard about this one, it sounded like an incredibly promising addition to what I basically consider a genre. My biggest fear was my own high expectations, but it seriously delivered.

For me, the biggest revelations were 1) Florence Pugh’s Amy (Constance, I know you identify as an Amy too; we will be getting into that), finally bringing justice to a misunderstood sister, and 2) the way Gerwig dealt with the role of money in the March family’s lives. I’ve seen arguments that the family March’s poverty wasn’t explored as much as it could have been, but I did feel like the incredibly limited choices for women and the pressure to save the family came across more than in other versions of the story...
So spoke Alissa Wilkinson and Meredith Haggerty. Constance Grady quickly added a comment about the "poverty" in which the oldest March sister is forced to live when she marries John Brooke.

First, a few basic points:

In the passage we've posted, we learn that Wilkinson "has all faith in Greta Gerwig," and that Haggerty is "a Little women diehard." This hagiographoic tone extends all through the colloquy. A similar tone has animated the vast bulk of upper-end mainstream discussion, which has been remarkably extensive over the past few months.

Beyond that, we learn that Haggerty and Wilkinson both "identify as an Amy." Later, Grady tell us this: "I am aggressively a Jo, for the record."

One last introductory point. In Vox's lengthy discussion, no one says that Little Women should win the Best Picture Oscar.

Eventually, the three discussants do take turns declaring that Gerwig was robbed when she didn't get a Best Director nomination. The discussion is so ritualistic that it deserves to be shown:
WILKINSON: I (unfortunately) think we need to talk about something frustrating about this movie’s Oscar chances, which is its many Oscar nominations (including for screenplay, actresses, and Best Picture) that somehow omit Gerwig as director. There are a lot of weird factors going into who gets nominated for director, of course, and many worthy candidates—as well as many worthy women who directed outstanding films this year. Should we be mad for Greta?

HAGGERTY: I think it’s impossible not to be mad for Greta in a year when Todd Phillips is nominated. I’m not going to pretend I fully understand what a director does, versus a cinematographer, or an editor, etc., but the look and feel of this film worked so well for me—nostalgic enough to evoke warm feelings, but fresh for a very familiar story. If a director can be judged on successful vibes (can a director be judged on successful vibes?) and also on not, say, boring me to tears by being overlong and indulgent (ahem, The Irishman), she was robbed.

GRADY: I am absolutely mad for Greta, especially since only five women have ever been nominated for Best Director. (Gerwig is one of them, for 2017’s Lady Bird.) The Academy seems to pretty consistently treat movies directed by women as if they just sprang into the world fully formed, like Athena out of Zeus’s head, without any women around to birth them.
This is ritualistic tribal dogma. Consider:

Even as she directly states that she (like almost everyone else) doesn't know how to judge a director's work, Haggerty says that Gerwig was robbed when she didn't get a Best Director nomination. She bases this judgment on the fact that "the feel of the film worked so well for me," but also on "successful vibes" and on the fact that a different film which did get nominated "bored me to tears."

Grady extends the claim that Gerwig got robbed on the basis of gender. She does so even as she notes the fact that this same Oscar directors' guild nominated Gerwig as Best Director two short years ago.

Today, within our failing tribe, this sort of thing counts as "analysis." Given the ways of human affairs, when we liberals are willing to dumb ourselves down to such an extent, progressive interests will be in a deep fail.

Meanwhile, let's be fair:

As noted above, none of the three discussants at Vox said that Little Women should win the Oscar for Best Picture. The headline which sat above their discussion simply put that claim in their mouths. Increasingly, this is the way our failing tribe performs our "journalism" in this, the fourth year A.T.—the fourth year After Trump.

Over the past several months, our tribe has been deeply sunk in propagandistics concerning this well-reviewed if imperfect film. In our view, this discussion has been deeply instructive concerning our tribe's intellectual capital—but also, concerning our tribe's current values.

The discussion at Vox is an embarrassment in an array of ways. As we'll note as the week proceeds, other discussions of Little Women at Vox have been even worse.

That said, the comments we couldn't quite get past were the early comments which brought the "poverty" in.

News flash! In Louisa May Alcoot's Little Women, the March family isn't living in poverty. Another family, the Hummels, is—but who gives a fig about them?

It's true that Alcott used the term "poverty" throughout the book to describe the March family's financial situation. But as described, the family isn't living in poverty as the term is now understood.

It's easy to see how our modern observers at Vox could have gotten a different impression. As described in Alcott's book, the March family has only one full-time, live-in servant—and when Amy takes the extended grand tour of Europe, she doesn't get to live at Versailles.

However distressing, these circumstances don't rise to the level of poverty as the term is now understood. The Hummels' circumstances do, and we see them described by Marmee, the March girls' mother, right at the start of the book:
ALCOTT (chapter 2): "Merry Christmas, little daughters!...I want to say one word before we sit down. Not far away from here lies a poor woman with a little newborn baby. Six children are huddled into one bed to keep from freezing, for they have no fire. There is nothing to eat over there, and the oldest boy came to tell me they were suffering hunger and cold. My girls, will you give them your breakfast as a Christmas present?"
That other family was living in poverty. When the March family brings them food and firewood, their condition is further described:
ALCOTT: A poor, bare, miserable room it was, with broken windows, no fire, ragged bedclothes, a sick mother, wailing baby, and a group of pale, hungry children cuddled under one old quilt, trying to keep warm.

How the big eyes stared and the blue lips smiled as the girls went in.

"Ach, mein Gott! It is good angels come to us!" said the poor woman, crying for joy.
The March sisters were angel children, "cried the poor things as they ate and warmed their purple hands at the comfortable blaze" Mrs. March had started for them. Or at least, so Alcott reported.

Within the moral universe Alcott created, this is the family which actually is suffering from poverty. Eventually, Beth March catches scarlet fever and dies because she is the one March sister who cares enough to continues to go to their home and help them.

Beth dies because she cared. But as you know if you've been reading the punditry, Beth is widely understood to be the boring sister—the sister no one identifies with. Does this possibly tell us something about us?

It's striking that none of our modern Alcott fans identifies with the most moral of the four March sisters. That said, consider the way Alcott's famous book ends.

Alcott's book ends in a way the modern fans reject. They find it "profoundly unsatisfying." Gerwig changed the ending completely, setting their hearts at ease.

How does Alcott's famous book end? First, Jo March marries Professor Bhaer, a person she deeply admires. Over at Vox, Grady finds him impossibly old and stout, as we'll see tomorrow.

Jo March marries Professor Bhaer, a person she deeply admires. And oh no! After she marries the fat old fellow, they open and run a school together!

Despite their location, they don't start Wellesley College, strange as that might seem. Nor do they start a school for young women who aspire to be painters or writers—for the Beths and Jos of the world.

Impossibly and maddeningly, they start a school for the destitute! Given the current values of our tribe, this is apparently hard to fathom. But in the following passage, with Jo speaking, we start to see that it's true.

The "my Fritz" to whom she refers is the overweight loser she married:
ALCOTT (chapter 47): "[T]his isn't a new idea of mine, but a long cherished plan. Before my Fritz came, I used to think how, when I'd made my fortune, and no one needed me at home, I'd hire a big house, and pick up some poor, forlorn little lads who hadn't any mothers, and take care of them, and make life jolly for them before it was too late. I see so many going to ruin for want of help at the right minute, I love so to do anything for them, I seem to feel their wants, and sympathize with their troubles, and oh, I should so like to be a mother to them!"

[...]

"I told my plan to Fritz once, and he said it was just what he would like, and agreed to try it when we got rich. Bless his dear heart, he's been doing it all his life—helping poor boys, I mean, not getting rich, that he'll never be."
There is a backstory in the book in which the professor, despite his girth, has in fact reduced his own circumstances to care for his motherless nephews.

At the end of Alcott's book, Jo and her unattractive husband open a school at which they hope to serve the poor! In the passage shown below, we're told how things go at the start:
ALCOTT: It was a very astonishing year altogether, for things seemed to happen in an unusually rapid and delightful manner. Almost before she knew where she was, Jo found herself married and settled at Plumfield. Then a family of six or seven boys sprung up like mushrooms, and flourished surprisingly, poor boys as well as rich, for Mr. Laurence was continually finding some touching case of destitution, and begging the Bhaers to take pity on the child, and he would gladly pay a trifle for its support. In this way, the sly old gentleman got round proud Jo, and furnished her with the style of boy in which she most delighted.

Of course it was uphill work at first, and Jo made queer mistakes, but the wise Professor steered her safely into calmer waters...
Despite his girth, Jo's husband was said to have offered good sound advice. Meanwhile, children facing "destitution" were being helped at their school.

These are the roles played by poverty and destitution within the moral universe of this famous novel. And that's the way the novel ends.

The voices of Vox take no inspiration from this, the actual ending of this actual book. Neither did Greta Gerwig in a well-reviewed film which might even help us, within our liberal tribe, understand why we're so widely loathed and so little respected.

Tomorrow: Ch-ch-ch-changes! Also, the factors which make Professor Bhaer "the most disappointing of all"

Who but the Times (and we the humans) would publish a column like this?

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 1, 2020

The funding of low-income schools:
Our current surprising situation is remarkably humbling.

We're being tutored by some of the most disconsolate future experts in all of human post-history. In effect, we're enrolled in one of their most depressing graduate-level courses:
Failed Mental Hygiene 401: The Ways Homo Sapiens "Reasoned"
This work is humbling, but can also be startling. These anthropologists' use of the future past tense is a highly unsettling practice.

In recent weeks, these scholars have devoted the bulk of class time to the hapless though instructive ways the new film, Little Women, has been discussed by pseudo-progressives of the current era.

Mordant humor saves the day as these highly credentialed experts discuss this embarrassing topic. Admittedly, the mordant humor is interspersed with the kinds of wails and groans which been unheard since the time of Dante's imagined Inferno.

Whatever! All next week, we'll continue to describe the results of their Little Women punditry findings. Today, though, we'll focus on the gnashing of teeth occasioned by Thursday's New York Times opinion column, The Hidden Inequality in Schools.

The column discussed, or seemed to discuss, a topic which seems important. We read the piece in our hard-copy Times. In print editions, the essay started like this:
AMERIKANER (1/30/20): The Hidden Inequality in Schools

Any debate about fairness in school funding has to start with clear data, but it turns out that data can be very hard to find.

Most people understand the inequity of school districts in wealthier areas having more money than those in less affluent communities. Addressing these disparities—across school districts—is important; but just as important, and less understood, is the unfair distribution of resources within school districts.

A rare study of this issue found that at least 4.5 million students from low-income backgrounds are in schools that receive roughly $1,200 less per child each year than wealthier schools in the very same district. In a single school, this shortfall could allow for the addition of 12 counselors, thousands of dollars in bonuses for dozens of teachers who transfer into hard-to-staff subjects and high quality art, music and extracurricular programming.
So the essay started. We've highlighted its key claim:

According to a rare study, "at least 4.5 million students from low-income backgrounds are in schools that receive roughly $1,200 less per child each year than wealthier schools in the very same district."

That's a surprising claim. Why would low-income schools receive less money than higher-income schools in the same school district?

We can't answer that question, but that $1200 per pupil would add up to a lot of money. At least in theory, that money could be put to a wide array of uses in those underfunded, low-income schools.

So the essay began. But how odd!

Though the essay continued for fourteen additional paragraphs, it never identified any school district in which this underfunding occurs or occurred. (Nor did it ever say who conducted the study to which it referred.)

Has any such district ever explained the reasons for this alleged underfunding? We were left without the slightest idea! Strangely, the essay never returned to a discussion of this alleged underfunding at all.

The essay started with a striking claim—millions of low-income kids attend schools which are significantly underfunded as compared with higher-income schools in the same school district.

But that was the end of any such discussion. When the essay finally mentioned a specific school district, we found ourselves pondering this:
AMERIKANER (pghs 10-11): Take, for example, School District U-46 in the northwest suburbs of Chicago. In this district, only 17 percent of the students from low-income families are proficient or above on state tests, compared with 45 percent of the students not from low-income families,

You might expect that additional dollars are directed toward the schools populated by those students from low-income families. Instead, the new government data shows schools in U-46 receive roughly the same range of funds regardless of how many students are living in poverty.
When the essay finally discussed a particular school district, a different sin was now alleged. Instead of sending extra funds to its low-income schools, District U-46 is funding all its schools roughly the same!

Why would a newspaper like the Times publish an essay like this? According to future experts, this is pretty much the best our species was wired to do!

"It may be hard to believe that editors at the New York Times couldn't see the problem here," one despondent scholar said, even as he struggled with a classic thousand-yard stare. "But as Professor Harari noted in real time, the species was wired for gossip and fiction—and above all else for repetition, and for moral pretense!"

We've shown you chunks of the maddening text as it appeared in the hard-copy Times. On line, the essay is somewhat longer, and its language is a bit more jumbled. But it does at least identify the source of the "rare study" it cites in its opening paragraphs.

The study was conducted by The Center for American Progress. On line, this link is provided.

The article to which the essay links is now almost five years old. The data on which the article was based came from the 2011-2012 school year.

The article did identify specific school districts which were allegedly underfunding their low-income schools. Here are the article's first two bullet points, exactly as they appeared:
Due to the loophole in federal law, more than 4.5 million low-income students attend inequitably funded Title I schools. In most states, there are tens of thousands of students from low-income households who attend Title I schools that are not funded equitably relative to other schools in their district. See the appendix for state-by-state results.

These inequitably funded schools receive around $1,200 less per student than comparison schools in their districts. Overall,these schools receive around $668,900 less per year than comparison schools. In Fort Worth, Texas, for example, inequitably funded Title I schools receive around $2,600 less per student.In some districts, the disparities are even wider. In Santa Fe, New Mexico, inequitably funded Title I schools receive around $4,900 less than other schools. These disparities can add up to millions of dollars at the state level. If these gaps were closed, inequitably funded schools in Texas would receive another $1.6 billion annually, and in New Mexico, they would have an additional $65 million. See the appendix for state-by-state results.
The essay in the Times accurately summarized these claims. But alas! These claims were all built around an alleged "loophole in federal law"—the so-called "compatibility loophole"—which is so poorly described at the start of the article that, truth to tell, we have no idea what the authors are talking about.

(Full disclosure: Down through the years, we've often found that liberal and progressive studies are built on conceptual sleight of hand, intentional or otherwise. We have no idea if that was the case here.)

Are millions of kids attending low-income schools which are seriously underfunded as compared with higher-income schools in their own school district?

In Thursday's Times, an essay started with that claim, but then it abandoned the topic. When we linked to the five-year-old report on which these claims were based, our tutors gnashed their teeth, then told us this:

"Our dearest Rappaccini! Perhaps now you see what we mean!"