Tips on how to break up with a friend!

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 7, 2017

Lead-exposed Times to the rescue: Kevin Drum's work on lead poisoning has been extremely instructive. Increasingly, we think of his work when we peruse the work of our upper-end press corps.

Lead exposure was much higher in past decades, Drum has noted. This can lead to significant loss of IQ points.

That brings us, once again, to the reimagined page A3 in today's New York Times. (For some reason, available in hard-copy only.) We'll skip this morning's NOTEWORTHY FACTS, unless you insist on these:

Also known as butterflying, spatchcocking is the method of cutting out a chicken's backbone, opening the bird up and pressing down on it so its breastbone cracks and flattens. Once it's spatchcocked, a chicken roasts more quickly and evenly than an intact bird.

In his later years, the billionaire arms trader Adrian Khashoggi lived in much-reduced circumstances. He flew on commercial jets and dismissed his bodyguard, a Korean martial arts expert known as Mr. Kill.

Do they strike you as "noteworthy facts?" Did someone at the New York suffer a lot of exposure?

With that second question in mind, the "Quote of the Day" is this:

"It's a way to meet people. You might even meet the love of your life in a taxi, you never know."

According to someone at the Times, that was the quote of the day from this morning's paper.

That said, the most remarkable feature today was the "Here to Help" feature. We sh*t you not. This morning's helpful mini-essay appeared beneath this heading:

Here to Help
HOW TO BREAK UP WITH A BAD FRIEND

How to break up with a bad friend? Is that anything like a "bad teacher?"

For whatever reason, that's what the heading says. Wisely, sagaciously, the mini-essay starts like this, initial tip included:

For many of us, our friends often stand in for family. But sometimes friendships go bad. Here are some tips on what to do when you need to end a friendship that has reached its expiration date.

Give it serious thought first
Once you initiate a breakup, there may be no turning back.

We sh*t you not. According to the New York Times, before you "break up with a bad friend," you should give it some serious thought!

All in all, this morning's five-tip Here to Help feature reads like the sort of thing teen magazines used to be mocked for. That said, many parts of this famous newspaper now seem to be written by people who are strikingly limited. Or does that reflect what the glorious Times has come to know about us?

In closing, the first clue in today's Mini Crossword was this:

"Jimmy Fallon's network"

Fallon's network? The answer was a three-letter word.

Times subscribers, let's give it a shot! Could the answer be "NBC?"