The god who clammed and thus failed: Half the country wants to hear (but mainly just see!) the elusive Hope Hicks speak out.
But even as that theme plays out, another key figure has disappeared. To all appearances, Robert S. Mueller—Mueller the God—has been kidnapped by some unnamed party, with no ransom note found!
Less dramatically, it seems that Mueller is simply refusing to speak to congressional committees. This behavior reaffirms one of this site's greatest themes.
Mueller was crowned as an establishment god over the course of the past several years. All over anti-Trump cable, scripted performers described the feats the fellow would surely perform with his so-called Mueller report.
Fabulous theories were presented as the next best thing to fact. He already had Trump's tax returns! The whole crew would be frog-marched to jail!
When the Mueller report appeared, it was a major letdown. Now it seems that Mueller the God is refusing to speak to the Congress. This reaffirms one of our basic holdings:
When our pundits decide, as a group, that someone is an establishment god, that god will end up taking advantage of his exalted status.(Why do we say "his?" See explanation below.)
How reliable is this thesis? We recall the exalted Colin Powell delivering that flimsy UN report. In the end, a succession of these universally acclaimed big pundit gods have failed.
(For the most recent example, we'd offer James B. Comey, once known as Comey the God. And by the way: Despite his squirrelly conduct in 2016, he's being re-established as a god now that he's anti-Trump.)
When happiest, our press corps runs on novelized tales about various demons and angels. This pattern has surfaced again in the way Mueller has been getting a pass during his months of avoidance.
Admit it! You almost never hear a discussion of the way this god has clammed. As they typically do at such junctures, the pundits are giving their great god a pass! Paul Ryan was always so honest, so wonky and so sincere, right up to the end!
In our view, it's amazing that Mueller has refused to appear before Congress. But the boys and girls of the pundit corps just keep averting their gaze from this remarkable conduct.
Who died and made Robert Mueller a god? The celebrity press corps did! That said, they've been engaged in this serial nonsense for at least the past thirty years.
Gender and the godhead: Almost all these establishment gods have been men. We'd say that Condoleezza Rice got about halfway there.
That said—for an example of our great theme, how about Sheryl Sandberg?
We could have said it, but didn't: Directly after paragraph 1:
"We've been subpoenaing Hicks for years. But we couldn't get her to respond!"