Kilgore explores a counterfactual!

MONDAY, AUGUST 19, 2019

Just imagine if Clinton had won:
As a general matter, we never discuss past booking discussions with representatives of Bryant Gumbel.

In this case, we'll make an exception. On Tuesday, November 7, 2000, we accepted a provisional booking to appear the next day, as a very-special guest star, on the CBS Early Show, co-hosted at that time by Gumbel and Jane Clayson.

The provision in question was this—we'd only appear if Candidate Gore won that day's election. If he won, we'd appear with a few friends from the good old days to describe the youthful Gore.

By Wednesday morning, the election was tied; the appearance never occurred. On Tuesday afternoon, it had been our sense that Gore was likely to win (as he probably actually did), and our thought about that went like this:

We were prepared to laugh our keisters off for maybe twenty-four hours. After that, we expected to settle in for a long-haul nightmare as the press corps' backlash occurred.

That backlash never would have stopped. It would have been full-blown AL GORE, LIAR until Gore lost re-election. Surely, everyone understands that, though everyone knows not to tell.

Within that context, we authored the deathless joke which Bill Clinton quoted in My Life—the joke Roger Simon quotes Clinton repeating on the very night it was authored, on the night in December 2000 when Candidate Gore finally conceded. The deathless joke, performed that evening at the D.C. Improv, went almost exactly like this:

"I think Gore really got the best of both worlds. Everyone knows he won the election, plus he doesn't have to serve!"

We believe you can see that evening's performance on-line, but we won't tell you where.

We were surprised, but also pleased, when the joke got a laugh that night. We repeated it later that night to the candidate who had conceded. Called from the room to take a phone call, the candidate repeated it by trans-Atlantic phone to Bill Clinton. At the end of his book about the 2000 campaign, Simon quotes Clinton repeating the joke that same night as he emerges from his private quarters on Air Force One, heading home from Europe.

"There's a great deal of truth to that joke," Gore said that evening in December 2000. A week or so later, Clinton said the exact same thing as we crawled through the reception line at a cattle-call White House Christmas party.

He repeated the joke word for word. It seemed to have rung a bell—and there it is in his book!

If Gore had been the winner in November 2000, four nightmare years would have followed. The same can be said about where we'd be if Candidate Clinton had beaten Trump by more than just the popular vote in November 2016.

In large part, these nightmares would have resulted from the screaming incompetence of our deeply self-impressed pseudo-liberal tribe. To wit:

Today, on Bill Clinton's 73rd birthday, Ed Kilgore asks how the world would be treating "first gentleman" Clinton if Hillary Clinton had won in 2016. In the relevant part of his essay, Kilgore quotes Todd Purdum writing this:
PURDUM (8/19/19): By the end of Hillary Clinton’s failed 2016 campaign—in which Donald Trump went so far as to bring three women who’d accused Bill Clinton of sexual misconduct to a debate—the bloom was well off the rose. The following year’s revelations about sexual allegations against powerful men from Harvey Weinstein to Matt Lauer cast Clinton’s history with Paula Jones, Juanita Broaddrick, Kathleen Willey, and, above all, Monica Lewinsky in a stark new light. It is a perverse reality that Trump is given a ho-hum pass by the public for repeated allegations of sexual misconduct and comments that would have convulsed the country in Clinton’s day—and that indeed did so—while Clinton’s reputation has been retroactively punished further.
Thus spake Purdum—and Kilgore. In the (important) light of the #MeToo movement, Bill Clinton's "history with" those women looks quite different now.

In truth, we'd have been involved in a rolling nightmare from election day forward had Hillary Clinton won. It would have been all Benghazi, all-Emailgate all the freaking time.

Surely everyone knows this. Everybody would have played, with the GOP in the lead role. Impeachment might have happened already; there might not have been enough hours in the day to get to Bill Clinton's history, #MeToo movement or not.

That said, riddle us this—what exactly is Bill Clinton's "history with Paula Jones, Juanita Broaddrick, Kathleen Willey, and, above all, Monica Lewinsky?" The history with Lewinsky is well known, thanks to the labors of Independent Counsel Javert. It involves ten acts of oral sex, plus late-night phone calls, spread out over several years.

That said, the history with the other three women is, in fact, largely unknown—and almost surely unknowable. Meanwhile, you'll note that Purdum and Kilgore have disappeared Gennifer Flowers, by whom the silly bills of the press corps swore when it helped keep tumescence alive.

Robert Ray was Kenneth Starr's successor as independent counsel. When he wrote the final report on the "Whitewater probe," he said his team had considered charging Willey with perjury, she'd lied to them much.

Such facts were aggressively kept from public view during the endless chase after Clinton and Clinton. Flowers has been disappeared several times, with no one explaining to the public why this had to be done.

(Amazingly, the New York Times brought Flowers back to life in this front-page gong-show report in October 2016. They even went with Connie Hamzy! No one in our hapless tribe stood up to say boo.)

What was Bill Clinton's actual history with Jones, Broaddrick and Willey? Did he have any history worth talking about with the ridiculous Flowers at all?

Regarding Flowers, the answer is almost surely no; she posited a torrid twelve-year love affair, but never claimed that her torrid affair with "my Bill" had been anything but consensual. (Bill Clinton copped to one brief interaction way back when, not involving intercourse.)

Regarding the three other women, we have no idea what did or didn't occur, though it seems fairly clear that nothing of any consequence happened with the truth-challenged Willey. (She too became a major hero of the lovesick boys of the mainstream press, right through the astonishing evening when a false accusation she made on Hardball almost got a journalist killed. You've never heard about that astonishing incident because the Kilgores and Purdums of the world have never wanted to break ranks with the guild. At that time, Hardball's Chris Matthews was a much more powerful player.)

At any rate, the children kept refusing to tell you such things, and our self-impressed liberal tribe is so deeply incompetent that we let their behavior go unchecked. Starting in March 1999, we even let their anger be redirected against Candidate Gore. For that treason, Candidate Bush squeaked into the White House, and was soon engaged in war against the children of Iraq. At one time, our pitiful tribe was even willing to pretend that we deeply cared about that!

The woods are lovely, dark and deep. Our liberal tribe is deeply pathetic—self-impressed, hapless, empty, sepulchral, wholly inept. Our joke appears on the last page of Simon's deathless book, "Divided We Stand: How Al Gore Beat George Bush and Lost the Presidency." It traveled from our lips to Gore's ears, and then, moments later, to Clinton's.

From there, it went to the boys and girls, doin' hard travelin' on Air Force One. If Hillary Clinton had reached the Oval, she would have been eaten alive by now.

34 comments:

  1. Does Somerby not understand that we are all involved in a rolling nightmare now, under Trump?

    How could the attack on Bill or Hillary be any worse than it has already been? Of course it wouldn't have stopped. The right never stopped obstructing Obama either. But no one would have undone all the staffing and work of the various cabinet departments, no one would have destabilized world relationships, no one would have withdrawn from treaties or mistreated immigrants or spent so much money on golf. So the Clintons would have been unhappy but our government would have been much better off.

    That stupid joke about Al Gore perhaps reveals some truth. If he was ambivalent about having to serve as president that may have affected both his campaigning and how hard he was willing to fight for his presidency when they tried to take it away (and succeeded).

    I would not be proud of having made such a joke, but Somerby clearly is.

    If Hillary Clinton demonstrated anything during her long campaign it is that she is a very tough person. I doubt the right could do anything to her that would have mattered. It took Comey and Russia to keep her out of office. Despite all the investigations, she always came out clean and it would have been no different had she become president, except our country would have been so much better off.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If Somerby doesn't believe this too, he is no liberal.

      Delete
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      My husband and I have been married for about 7 yrs now. We were happily married with two kids, a boy and a girl. 3 months ago, I started to notice some strange behavior from him and a few weeks later I found out that my husband is seeing someone. He started coming home late from work, he hardly care about me or the kids anymore, Sometimes he goes out and doesn't even come back home for about 2-3 days. I did all I could to rectify this problem but all to no avail. I became very worried and needed help. As I was browsing through the Internet one day, I came across a website that suggested that Dr Great can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he did a spell for me. Two days later, my husband came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my family are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr Great . If you need a spell caster that can cast a spell that truly works, I suggest you contact him. He will not disappoint you. This is his E-mail:

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  2. "Our liberal tribe is deeply pathetic—self-impressed, hapless, empty, sepulchral, wholly inept"

    But what of your tribe, Bob ? The tribe of people who spend their entire existence attacking liberals and defending Trump, therefore acting as 'useless idiots for Trump' ? That is just a subset of the tribe of Trumptards.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Somerby does not care about blogging. On his way out to the pasture, it will just be about attempting to establish a legacy. If the swine only understood his pearls. Poor guy, if you're in the vicinity, give him a hug.


    I'm going out to clean the pasture spring;
    I'll only stop to rake the leaves away
    (And wait to watch the water clear, I may):
    I sha'n't be gone long.—You come too.

    I'm going out to fetch the little calf
    That's standing by the mother. It's so young,
    It totters when she licks it with her tongue.
    I sha'n't be gone long.—You come too.

    -Robert Frost

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  20. Hello I'm From Memphis Tennessee, USA I feel so joyful today because of the help Dr Orman has rendered to me for helping me to get my Husband back with his spell. I have been married for 4 years and it has been so terrible because my husband was cheating on me and was seeking for a divorce. But when i came across Dr Orman Email, on the internet posted by a lady, i decided to get in touch with him and i explained my situation to him and then seek his help but to my greatest surprise he told me that he will help me with my case for there is no problem without a solution. Here i am celebrating because my Husband is back home and am really enjoying my marriage, what a great celebration. i will keep on testifying on the internet because Dr Orman is truly a real spell caster. Why not contact Dr Orman now if you are facing any challenges in your relationship life. Email orman.spiritualist3002@gmail.com Also specialize i1) or whatsapp +905398102247 love Spell
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    3) Spells of marriage4) Penis enlargement 5) Pregnancy problems6) Healing spell
    contact this great man if you have a problem for a lasting solution Through Email: orman.spiritualist3002@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  21. I can't believe it. In just two hours of contact with Dr Okiti. Every negative feeling around me disappeared. He cast a spell for me against the deadly virus it save my mom and now my ex is back, she practically sent me over 32 messages, its amazed me, how the seemingly bad luck turn good by the great Dr Okiti spell. Get to know him and see how your life will be turned around. Okitilovespelltemple@gmail. com I have seen some powerful psychic, yet none have the indebt understanding of the great Dr Okiti.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I found Dr Okiti online and read his reviews which were all good so I decided to call him for a psychic reading. I must say I was surprised with his accuracy. Over all I had an insightful reading and some of the things he told me have come true. I would recommend him to my friends and anyone looking to for a reading.:Okitilovespelltample@gmail.com or WhatsApp on +2348140757352

    ReplyDelete


  23. I Lost my Money to scammers but not anymore

    Well, who would have believed this. When I saw a comment

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    ReplyDelete
  24. I really want to thank Dr Emu for saving my marriage. My wife really treated me badly and left home for almost 3 month this got me sick and confused. Then I told my friend about how my wife has changed towards me then she told me to contact Dr Emu that he will help me bring back my wife and change her back to a good woman. I never believed in all this but I gave it a try. Dr Emu casted a spell of return of love on her, and my wife came back home for forgiveness and today we are happy again. If you are going through any relationship stress or you want back your Ex or Divorce husband you can contact his whatsapp +2347012841542 or email emutemple@gmail.com 

    ReplyDelete
  25. This testimony of DR ISIKOLO (https://isikololovetemple.com) help for me is going to be declared all over the internet to publish his name to people and allow others who have relationship problems to be helped by him. Trust is the key to a successful spell. My name is Jamie Hartfield and I am from Texas. I started writing this testimony on Wed 29th of July, 2020 and I purposefully put the date here so that I remember that it is just within 2 days of contacting DR ISIKOLO that my long lost relationship with my ex wife was finally over. I reconnected with my ex wife on the 3rd of Dec after contacting DR ISIKOLO on the 30th of Nov through his email isikolosolutionhome@gmail.com and within 2 days, my ex wife came back to me after separating from her for over 8 years. It was a miracle because I never believed it would be possible. I am still surprised that as I am writing this testimony, she is still sleeping in our matrimonial bed. I am indeed happy sir. Thank you for helping me and I pray other wonderful people give wonderful testimonies too about you. Get in touch with DR ISIKOLO to save your relationship. His email: isikolosolutionhome@gmail.com You can also WhatsApp/Viber him on +2348133261196

    ReplyDelete
  26. Omg I Finally Got Helped  !! I'm so excited right now, I just have to share my testimony on this Forum.. The feeling of being loved takes away so much burden from our shoulders. I had all this but I made a big mistake when I cheated on my wife with another woman  and my wife left me for over 4 months after she found out..  I was lonely, sad and devastated. Luckily I was directed to a very powerful spell caster Dr Emu who helped me cast a spell of reconciliation on our Relationship and he brought back my wife and now she loves me far more than ever.. I'm so happy with life now. Thank you so much Dr Emu, kindly Contact  Dr Emu Today and get any kind of help you want.. Via Email emutemple@gmail.com or Call/WhatsApp +2347012841542

    ReplyDelete
  27. After being in relationship with him for seven years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster DR ISIKOLO that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before two days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: isikolosolutionhome@gmail.com or his WhatsApp him on: +2348133261196.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Looking a spell caster, root doctor ?
    This doctor is very private and works fast.
    Start by email the words
    "Olowairumudonmon"
    To Okitilovespelltemple@gmail. com
    And the doctor will contact you.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Every time I take a look back at what had happened to me I will always appreciate the great Dr Okiti for what he has done for me this spell caster brought back my ex boyfriend who left me just for no reason. I met the great spell caster online and he told me all I need to do, Now am glad that Dr Okiti brought him back and he love me more then he used to! You can also contact him on his active email on( Okitilovespelltemple@gmail.com or add him on WhatsApp on +2348140757352

    ReplyDelete
  30. Are you in bad need of love spell to bring back your ex lover or reunite your marriage? Email DR ISIKOLO for quick 48 hours solution. I had a problem with my husband a year and six months ago, which lead us apart. When he broke up with me, I was confuse and did not know what to do to get him back, I felt so empty inside. Until i came across DR ISIKOLO on the internet on how He has helped so many people solve there various problem. I emailed Him and I told Him my problem and i did what he asked me to do for him to help me, to briefly make the long story short, Before I knew it, in less than 48 HOURS, my Husband gave me a call and he came back to me and told me he was sorry about what was going on between the both of us. Finally I am writing this testimony to offer my thanks and deep gratitude to you DR ISIKOLO for keeping to your words and your promises in bringing him back to me in just 48 hours of your powerful spell casting, and for using your gifted and great powers to bring him back. If you need his help, you can email him at: isikolosolutionhome@gmail.com You can also WhatsApp/Viber him on +2348133261196.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Please visit
    (http://dradodalovetemple.com)
    (https://youtu.be/B279mkEo_C4)
    i am here to give testimony on how this powerful spell caster called Dr Adoda helped me to fix my relationship. i was heartbroken when my fiancee told me he is no longer interested in marrying me because he was having an affair with the other woman where he work. I cried and sobbed every day, until it got so bad that I reached out to the Internet for help, that was when i read a review about the great work of Dr Adoda, then i contacted him for help to get my lover back, he helped me cast a powerful (reconciliation love spell) and to my greatest surprise after 48 hours of doing the love spell my Fiancee came back on his knees begging me to forgive him We are now happily married and all thanks goes to Dr Adoda Wonders for helping me save my relationship you can contact Dr Adoda through his email address: adodalovespelltemple440@gmail.com or WHATSAPP him on+2348112825421

    ReplyDelete