SEPARATION: He's "likely to [BLEEP] in the Oval Office!"

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 23, 2024

Our blue tribe averts its gaze: According to the leading authority on such matters, the Fox News Channel's Brian Kilmeade is 59 years old.

So is the channel's Greg Gutfeld. This morning, we'll start right there.

We're so old that we can remember when Fox began experimenting with Gutfeld's brand of programming. The leading authority on the Sat Matean's career arc describes it in this manner:

Beginning on February 5, 2007, Gutfeld served as host of the late-night talk show Red Eye on the Fox News Channel. The hour-long show initially aired at 2:00 A.M. ET Monday through Saturday mornings and at 11:00 P.M. on Saturday evenings. However, beginning in October 2007, the show began airing at 3:00 A.M. Monday through Saturday mornings while retaining its 11:00 P.M timeslot on Saturday evenings. 

From 2007 to 2013, Bill Schulz served as Gutfeld's sidekick, and Andy Levy served as the show's ombudsman. Schulz had been Gutfeld's colleague at Stuff magazine...

On July 11, 2011, Gutfeld became a co-host and panelist on the Fox News political talk show The Five, which airs weekdays at 5:00 P.M. ET. Gutfeld left Red Eye in February 2015...

For the record, we think the authority should have said that Red Eye aired at 2 or 3 a.m. on Tuesday through Saturday mornings. At any rate, according to this further discussion, "Red Eye was originally named Wasteland in its early testing stages." 

The experiment—or at least, the enterprise which resembles an experiment—started at 3 in the morning! Gutfeld's sidekick had served with him during his tenure at Stuff.

At one point, we saw our friend, San Francisco's Will Durst, guesting on the middle-of-the-night TV program. Because Will is one of the world's greatest people, we assumed that meant that Gutfeld was basically OK.

At any rate, the experiment started at 3 a.m. According to that leading authority, it continued along in this fashion:

On May 31, 2015, Gutfeld began hosting a new weekly late-night talk show on Fox News called The Greg Gutfeld Show, which aired at 10:00 P.M. ET on Saturdays. 

In February 2021, it was announced that, beginning in the second quarter, the show would move to weeknights at 11:00 P.M. ET. On March 10, 2021, it was announced that the new weeknight show would be called Gutfeld! and premiere on April 5. 

In August 2021, Gutfeld! overtook The Late Show with Stephen Colbert in the nightly ratings, becoming the highest-rated late-night talk show in the United States. It averaged 2.12 million nightly viewers, more than The Late Show, The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, and Jimmy Kimmel Live!.

By the end of 2021, the combined viewership for Gutfeld! and The Five averaged over five million viewers.

Gutfeld has appeared as a guest on Coffee with Scott Adams and The Adam Carolla Show.

Everything's possible in America! Gutfeld made it all the way from 3 a.m. to a spot on Carolla's show—Carolla, he of The Man Show!

The Man Show is particularly well known for its buxom female models, the [NAME OF GROUP WITHHELD], who would dance in themed, revealing costumes at the opening of every show, in the aisles of the audience just before The Man Show went to commercial break, and during the end segment "Girls [sic] on Trampolines".

The first year of The Man Show featured beer-guzzling entertainer Bill 'The Fox' Foster as the show's emcee. Foster specialized in chugging two beers in record time (sometimes while suspended upside down) and singing lewd drinking songs. He would close every episode by leading the audience in the German drinking toast Zicke, Zacke, Zicke, Zacke, Hoi, Hoi, Hoi!, a tradition that the show continued after his death from prostate cancer in 2000.

Not that there's anything wrong with it! Unless you think there maybe is.

Gutfeld had come a long way, baby—all the way from 3 a.m. to stardom alongside Carolla! Along the way, his eponymous program on the channel had made him "the highest-rated late-night talk show [host] in the United States."

At this site, we can't say that we're enthralled with Gutfeld's current sensibility. We'll spare you news of the opening segment of last evening's Gutfeld! program, other than to say that its topic didn't lend itself to comments about President Biden.

In the evening's second segment, Gutfeld began making up lost ground. The topic involved this very peculiar news report from the New York Times about the more than twenty-four biting incidents caused by Commander, President Biden's former dog. 

Commander bit a lot of people. Gutfeld started his discussion as shown:

GUTFELD (2/22/24): He's the commander-in-chief who can still use his teeth...

The White House says President Biden has given his German shepherd, Commander, away to relatives following at least twenty-four reports of incidents against Secret Service members between October 2022 and July of last year. This means the only one likely to crap in the Oval Office now is Joe.

[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]

Instantly, there followed a similar piece of analysis concerning Hunter Biden. Still within the segment's first minute, it was on to another target:

GUTFELD: [The report included a case in which White House tours had to be suspended so blood could be mopped from the floor, which was quickly bottled for Nancy Pelosi's anti-aging bath.

[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE]

GUTFELD: That's terrible.

And another attack where an agent suffered a severe deep open wound at Biden's Delaware beach house. In Commander's defense, he was upset about Joe pissing in his dog bed.

And so on, endlessly, from there. At the age of 59, this is where Greg Gutfeld is. 

The Gutfeld! show airs in primetime, each weekday night, on the Fox News Channel. Last night, Gutfeld had assembled his usual four-member panel of analysts to help him sift world news.

He surrounded himself with two B-room comedians and with a former professional wrestler who now tours as a comedian. Also, with one "money maven" dragged in from the Fox Business Channel. 

When he finally threw to comedian Jim Norton, this is what occurred:

GUTFELD: Apparently, Biden's as bad with pets as he is with humans. He can't raise anything, whether it's dogs or humans, a border wall, or an erection. 

TYRUS: Ooh. Jesus!

[AUDIENCE GROANS]

[...]

GUTFELD: Jimmy, you love dogs. Some might say a little too much.

COMEDIAN JIM NORTON: Yes. I think Joe Biden spoiled that dog with peanut butter.

GUTFELD: [after extended feigned laughter]: Just the image itself is making me warm all over.

Was that an allusion to humans engaging in sex with dogs? We're happy to say that we're not entirely sure.

If you want to watch this entire segment, you can start by clicking here. We'd advise you to steel yourself against this program's soul-draining capacity. But so it goes, night after night, in prime time—not at 3 a.m.—on this major American "news channel."

Who can say why Gutfeld is still behaving this way at the age of 59? While we're at it, who can say why we humans ever behave this way?

One answer might go like this—for us human beings, sexuality and romance have always proven to be difficult, challenging, hard. Below, you see Agamenon lord of men, complaining about the idea that he will have to return his prize, the "girl" Chryseis, to her elderly father, the priest.

We're still in Book one of the Iliad—Book One, "The Rage of Achilles:"

But King Agamemnon countered, "Not so quickly,
brave as you are, godlike Achilles—trying to cheat me.
Oh no, you won't get past me, take me in that way!
What do you want? To cling to your own prize
hile I sit calmly by—empty-handed here?
Is that why you order me to give her back?
No—if our generous Argives will give me a prize,
a match for my desires, equal to what I've lost.
well and good. But if they give me nothing
I will take a prize myself-your own, or Ajax'
or Odysseus' prize—I'll commandeer her myself
and let that man I go to visit choke with rage!

There's a lot of rage among the Achaeans as this story begins to takes shape.

At any rate, Agamemnon agrees to surrender "Chryseis herself, in all her beauty." But as a replacement, he goes to Achilles' tents and takes Briseis, the swift runner's wartime "prize."

This action triggers Achilles' rage, and sets the in motion the chain of events which will end with this famous closing line, as rendered by Richmond Lattimore:

Such was the burial of Hector, breaker of horses.

Inside the towering walls of Troy, Hector is shown to be a loving husband and a delighted father. The Iliad is clogged with images of a wide array of recognizable modern human types.

We're speaking about Greg Gutfeld today. We're skipping past Brian Kilmeade, who's also 59.

Last Saturday night, Kilmeade got busy pushing his channel's Storyline concerning various aspects of urban crime. Two weeks earlier, on February 3, he had been joined by John Walsh (America's Most Wanted) in a similar segment about crime—a segment which came to us, live and direct, from the front seat of the clown car.

Until that very moment, we didn't know that Walsh was like that. Kilmeade's been like that for the past twenty-five years.

Due to the power of Separation, little of this is ever mentioned by the organs of our own blue tribe. The silence concerning gender politics dates back many years within the cable news universe.

Once in a while, a very brief performative era may occur. MeToo came and went quite quickly, with everybody swearing that they never had any idea.

Last night, Gutfeld and them were at it again, as they are night. The program's a little bit nutty and a whole lot smutty. This is who and what the Serra High graduate is at 59 years of age!

What makes friends and neighbors behave in such unhelpful ways? 

At this site, we'll continue to create a record of the ongoing siege of the Biden White House, just as sacred Homer recorded the siege of Troy.

Along the way, no one is told about this ongoing conduct on Fox. Thanks to the power of the god Separation, a larger question lies unanswered:

Can our blue tribe ever learn how to speak to others? Separation, and the silence it enables, keep us from ever having to speak to that challenging task.

Tomorrow: Who was Aleksei Navalny?


71 comments:

  1. "Fox contributor says Trump’s $400 bootleg off-whites are “connecting with Black America” because Black people “love sneakers... certainly in the inner city”

    Meanwhile, DeSantis says he doesn't want Trump to decide on his VP using identity politics because someone who represents 10-15% of the country shouldn't be in charge of everyone.

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  2. "At one point, we saw our friend, San Francisco's Will Durst, guesting on the middle-of-the-night TV program. Because Will is one of the world's greatest people, we assumed that meant that Gutfeld was basically OK."

    Why would Somerby think this? Durst hosting a late-night show only means that he was willing to work for the money. Given that he is described online as a bi-partisan basher of political parties, and a political satirist for people who don't like politics, why wouldn't he appear on Gutfeld's show.

    And I recall that a few weeks ago Somerby was calling the Fox lineup of comedians mid-level comics. If Gutfeld's show was attracting bigger audiences than Colbert's he is not mid-level at all, but highly successful. I suspect that it is his right wing appeal, not his comedy, that attracted such a large late-night audience on Fox, while blue viewers had to split their time among many alternatives, but knocking Gutfeld as mediocre seems inappropriate.

    And that furthers the view that Somerby's criticism of Fox comedy is tinged with professional jealousy.

    I have never been a fan of Durst. Someone who mocks everyone strikes me as a nihilist. It is why I found Jon Stewart's election coverage irritating. He used to knock Hillary as if it were obligatory, perhaps knowing his audience of young male viewers would like it, instead of recognizing the danger Trump posed in 2015-16. Colbert never suffered from that deficiency. But then Trevor Noah felt he had to bash Hillary too and I stopped watching the Daily Show entirely.

    Why can't political comedians on the left address the realities of our political situation without bothsidesing it? The right has no such constraint.

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  3. Bob, with Gutfeld’s numbers, it’s just a matter of time before the FCC or some extremely connected attorneys come after Greg over misinformation, or a claim of past sexual harassment, a culture of rape, etc.

    Then people are fired and the show is revamped or canceled.

    You worry too much.

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    Replies
    1. Do I understand you to say that Bill O”Reilly was framed?

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    2. Anonymouse 11:04am, do I understand you to believe that there’s no such thing as guilt by association?

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    3. Somerby himself appeared on Bill O'Reilly's show on Fox five times. Did he do that because he was a true believer of Fox disinformation or did he do it for the money? Is it possible that Somerby's affinity for Fox precedes Trump's entry into politics? We have no idea what Durst's actual politics are, aside from his comedy, but the ability to mock both sides suggests he wasn't taking it very seriously. For the rest of it, it matters a lot who gets elected, because political decisions affect our lives. Not so cosseted mid-level celebrities. Will Bill Maher care when people with brown skin start being put into camps "like no one has ever seen before" (to quote Dear Leader)?

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    4. As long as Gutfeld continues to provide NO information he is safe.

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    5. Anonymouse 11:50sm, my guess is that Bob went on O’Reilly for the same reason he has appeared on C-Span. He was invited and he grabbed the opportunity to speak his mind.

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    6. Do I understand you to say you can’t answer a question without deflecting as a life as a dumb right winger dictates? Guilt by association can be unfair in some instances, though it’s not always unfair. See, that is how you answer a question.

      Delete
    7. Anonymouse 4:12pm, I understand you perfectly. I also understand that you wouldn’t bring up Matt Lauer at the suggestion that prior to Mika, they tried to shut down Joe Scarborough with an accusation that he killed his staffer/lover.

      Delete
    8. As big of a tool Bill O'Reilly was, he didn't win all his arguments on his show. It was a good tactic to go on his show and show the right-wing as jabbering angry morons.

      They've since changed their tune and decided everyone else is uptight and they're the jokesters. But they are so goddamn racist and out of touch they called Biden an old fart for criticizing grocery prices and are now calling Trump's shoes a reason Black voters should have interest in him. They don't know how to be actual shitkickers like actual poor people. They're imitating the crassness of anti-capitalist culture while profiting handsomely.

      McCarthyism took a big chunk of America's heart and intellect out of commission, so did killing Black Panthers, union organizers, etc. and now they are hungrily trying to finish the job, hook or crook.

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    9. Anonymouse 6:20pm, Biden was made fun of because of the timing of the shrinkflation video.

      Notice that I don’t say “his timing” because it was obvious that his handlers put him out there to give that speech after Hur’s assessment of his mental acuity.

      Until then the only thing the country heard was how great all things economic are at this point in time. Then Hur said that POTUS is cognitively out of touch so the dorm room denizens of the administration get the old guy out denouncing a reduction in the size of potato chip packaging.

      I do think this is a valid concern, but I also think trying to raise money via tennis shoes when you’ve been fined over 300 million is a valid too.

      As for McCarthyism, you’re its second coming. The left accuses all their opposition as being Russian agents.

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    10. Stock market set another record today.

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    11. LOLCec, sure, that's just what we need, a former president hawking cheap and tawdry sneakers at an insanely inflated price so he can take his cut to pay his legal bills. And no person in their right mind would play tennis in them. I hear one of your racist party proponents thinks this will help him with the black inner city vote, since we all know blacks like sneakers. bwahahahaha!!!

      Delete
  4. Hydeia Broadbent has died.

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    Replies
    1. This guy had your schtick long before you and he does it a lot better than you do:

      https://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2024/02/erik-visits-an-american-grave-part-1556

      Delete
    2. Erik discusses people who died years, decades, even one or two centuries ago. I note, without discussion, people who died hours or days ago.

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    3. Was that before or after he talked about how Trump expanded NATO twice ?

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    4. https://www.cnn.com/2019/11/17/politics/trump-soft-on-russia/index.html

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  5. "At this site, we'll continue to create a record of the ongoing siege of the Biden White House, just as sacred Homer recorded the siege of Troy."

    This may be an apt comparison. I suspect that Somerby's essays are no more accurate than those of a fictional Homer recording a supposed siege (which may or may not have happened) more than 400 years after the fact. Somerby writes this sentence as if Homer were an embedded journalist documents events as they happened. That is so far from truth that Somerby should not compare himself to Homer if he expects any of his readers to trust his veracity on anything at all. (The for the record, I do not trust Somerby on any subject.)

    If the stuff Somerby writes here (mostly "Biden is too old" and feeble when he campaigns) were the only record of this campaign, it would be incomplete, inaccurate, and present an entirely false picture of what is happening. I suspect Homer was no better, and calling him "sacred" changes nothing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. "... we didn't know that Walsh was like that."

    A guy who exploited his son's murder to land a TV show?

    ReplyDelete
  7. "MeToo came and went quite quickly, with everybody swearing that they never had any idea."

    MeToo is not gone. Look at the sex scandal in CPAC. Look at E.Jean Carroll's jury results.

    If Somerby thinks women don't care about sexual abuse any more, he is very mistaken. He keeps trying to pretend that today is just as bad as ancient times, but that is wrong too. This events are now crimes and they are being prosecuted. And women are voting for Biden because they care and see that Democrats take this seriously. Somerby should too. He doesn't seem to be doing that, with his apologies for the sexual abuse in The Iliad.

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    1. Anonymouse 12:01pm, it has taken years to get the guest list of Epstein Island. It was news for three days.

      Undoubtably, we have made progress since Homer’s time. However, I’m not sure how you can simultaneously say that it has been an arduous road and also suggest that Bob is negating any progress by suggesting that issues involving power and conquest (sexual and otherwise) are still a struggle, as seen on a highly rated show that he finds smutty, puerile, and misogynistic.

      He wonders why this is not being called out by other powerful tv news people.

      It will be, Bob. It will be. There’s an investigation somewhere in the works right now.

      Delete
    2. Cecelia, what do you think of the Gutfeld show?

      Delete
    3. Anonymouse 1:07pm, I’ve never watched it. It sounds silly and juvenile.

      Delete
    4. "If Somerby thinks women don't care about sexual abuse any more, he is very mistaken."

      Could any sentient reader possibly believe that "Somerby thinks women don't care about sexual abuse"? But, put the accusation in the subjunctive, and you don't have to support this baseless accusation with any quotations.

      Delete
    5. "If Somerby thinks women don't care about sexual abuse any more, he is very mistaken."

      There's no subjunctive in that sentence. It's indicative all the way.

      Delete
    6. We do didn’t need the guest list ( dubious application here in every way) to know the one guy who fully signed off on Epstein and his lifestyle. That would be the guy Cecelia voted for twice.

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    7. Anonymouse 4:29pm, that and the rape of Philomela, the killing Lincoln and Kennedy, and your halitosis.

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    8. Pied Piper. I quoted what Somerby said. Address his statement.

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    9. Anonymouse 4:53pm, didn’t accuse women of not caring about sexual harassment/misogyny. He suggested that the media and the chattering class in general invariably move on to next big issue and fail to keep watch even within their own industry.

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    10. That isn’t true for sexual abuse.

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    11. Anonymouse 5:19pm, what was Jeff Epstein if not an abuser.

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    12. Somerby suggested MeToo was over. Epstein is an example that it is not over. He was prosecuted again despite his previous conviction were he was let off easy.

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    13. McCarthy was removed by Matt Gaetz because McCarthy referred Gaetz to the House ethics committee for engaging in sex with a minor and being involved in sex trafficking with a convicted associate. Sex abuse is still being taken seriously and is now being prosecuted. MeToo is not over.

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    14. "Pied Piper. I quoted what Somerby said. Address his statement."

      You suggested that Somerby thinks women don't care about abuse. I merely pointed out that your suggestion is ridiculous.

      Otherwise, I don't take assignments from you.

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    15. Anonymouse 6:08pm, so where is it? Where is the media crusade on Gaetz and Epstein Island vacationers?


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    16. 3:35 - BTW, I think you're right, to my chagrin and embarrassment.

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    17. @6:42 -- Look in the blue media. You won't hear it on Fox.

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    18. Pied Piper, I'm the one you owe the apology to -- the author of the sentence in question.

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    19. It was a small error, Pied Piper. Don’t worry about it.

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    20. 7:18 - OK. I’m sorry that you make such ridiculous assertions about what Somerby thinks.

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    21. Anonymouse 7:17 pm, we don’t hear it anywhere. Somerby has the media’s number.

      Delete
    22. 9:59,
      So do the people who point out the corporations who own the media set the agenda, and they love the corporate tax breaks the Republican Party gives them.
      Do you really think people care more that Biden is old, then they do that Trump is a rapist?

      Delete
  8. Retail theft in California is not tolerated. What does the ringleader look like? You won’t be surprised.

    https://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/local/bonsall-woman-suspected-ringleader-of-8m-retail-theft-ring-hitting-200-ulta-stores/3441772/

    ReplyDelete
  9. There isn't really a polite way to say that America is segregated and that its history of workaholism and religiosity produced a horde of men with a sexism and testosterone-fixation.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Kevin:

    https://jabberwocking.com/israeli-jews-strongly-favor-all-out-war-in-gaza/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A push poll by Israel's version of Rasmussen.

      Delete
  11. Kevin:

    https://jabberwocking.com/republicans-cant-tap-dance-around-ivf/

    ReplyDelete
  12. We understand that Gutfeld's jokes are crude and unfunny. Couldn't Somerby just say that instead of subjecting all of us here to a repetition of the unfair and untrue portrayal of Biden? This is why it seems like Somerby's main purpose here is not to criticize Gutfeld but to provide a supposedly liberal platform to repeat derogatory remarks about Biden.

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  13. I feel sorry for Commander. The secret service agents are guests in his house, not vice versa. It is a dog's instinct to protect his home and family, as Commander did. This is especially true of a dog bred for loyalty and aggression, as is true of Commander's breed.

    Biden has other things to do besides supervising his dog and the inept agents who triggered Commander's attacks.

    ReplyDelete
  14. "A billboard spotted Friday at the Conservative Political Action Conference bemoaning the plight of men accused of domestic violence caused an uproar when it was shared on X."

    https://www.rawstory.com/cpac-domestic-violence/

    Concern about domestic violence (which also happens to be the #1 predictor of mass shootings) has not waned among Democrats and women in general, either. It has been dropped as an issue by the right wing, however. This is the problem with comedians like Gutfeld and The Man Show -- it encourages toxic masculinity, which not only supports but eggs men into committing domestic violence against women, in an attempt to feel more manly and dominant. Tucker Carlson used to promote this on his show, even to the point of convincing men to tan their testicles in an effort to attain greater masculinity. This is the other side of the sexism and misogyny promoted by these "comedians" and hosts on Fox News.

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  15. Women still care about the systematic use of rape and sexual violence against women on 10/7 by Hamas.

    The right wing, instead of recognizing women's concerns, has adopted a rapist as their presidential candidate. There is an ever-widening gender gap between Republicans and Democrats, obvious in Biden's win in 2020, because women will not vote for Trump, a man who clearly disrespects women and lacks any care for their safety.

    If Somerby and the right gives up caring about women's votes, Trump cannot win in November. Every time Trump disrespects Nikki Haley, he demonstrates the lack of respect the right holds for women in its own party. Democratic women may not vote for Nikki Haley instead of Biden, but Republican women may well stay home rather than vote for Trump.

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    Replies
    1. Are you sure women still care, because from what I’m seeing on the leftwing side of X, is that women care more about shutting down the Israeli military than about exterminating the rapists living their midst.

      Delete
    2. Just because YOU don't care doesn't mean women don't care.

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    3. Anonymouse 7:04pm, there’s no indication of it. As far as anonymices go, they even blast Somerby for caring about misogyny on a highly rated tv show.

      We see what you really care about.

      Delete
    4. Somerby doesn’t care about misogyny.

      Delete
    5. "We see what you really care about."
      And we see what the Right really cares about. When we mention it, the Right gets mad because it isn't politically correct.

      Delete
  16. "
    Heritage Foundation
    @Heritage
    ·
    May 27, 2023
    "It seems to me that a good place to start would be a feminist movement against the pill, & for... returning the consequentiality to sex."

    Conservatives have to lead the way in restoring sex to its true purpose, & ending recreational sex & senseless use of birth control pills."

    Notice the way the right wing Heritage Foundation co-opts the word "feminist" and redefines it to refer to their own suggested plan to eliminate contraception in order to return sex to solely for procreation. At that point women's sole value and purpose in life will be expected to be breeding and child-rearing. No more participation in mainstream society.

    This is a threat to all women but especially to conservative women who trust men with their futures.

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  17. Somerby looks for messages in The Iliad, but that makes as much sense as looking for messages in another ancient book written by dubious authors without historical evidence that its characters or narrative ever existed: The Bible. Would we sit still for a moment for the nonsense in the Iliad if Somerby told us the stories were biblical? No. So, why does Somerby place such faith in his own book supposedly written by "sacred Homer" a man who has not been proven to have ever existed, much less the events he described in such detail.

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    Replies
    1. Perhaps Homer wrote his story from golden tablets that he transcribed and then reburied?

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    2. Anonymouse 7:15pm, I doubt there are three devout atheists in ten who find Homer or the Bible without any relevance in the slightest as their narratives and teaching.

      You’d dismiss the utility of thumbs if Bob wrote an ode to dexterity.

      Delete
    3. Its not relevant to the election, whatever else it may be rlevant to.

      Delete
    4. Cecelia,
      And the Right would be supporters of thumb usage, by white men only.

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    5. That makes as much sense as anything else the right supports.

      Delete
  18. Kevin asks a question that I never thought of:

    https://jabberwocking.com/who-was-chuck-grassleys-leaker/

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  19. It’s beginning to dawn on the howler readers that Somerby likes watching Gutfeld.

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  20. If an embryo is a person, freezing it is a crime.

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  21. Another post telling us what we already know about right wing media.It caters to the willingly uninformed.What new?

    ReplyDelete